


Only a few weeks

by CPD_rookie



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:54:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 46,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25863190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CPD_rookie/pseuds/CPD_rookie
Summary: Post 7x18. Hailey comes to terms with what has just happened and what she needs to do next.
Relationships: Jay Halstead & Hailey Upton, Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton
Comments: 15
Kudos: 60





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason I've never really checked out AO3 before but thought I might try it out to see how it goes. I posted this story over at FFN already, but since it's complete and I'm getting back into writing more, I figured I'd post it here too for anyone who might be interested.

Hailey sat in her car, her eyes set straight ahead, but she wasn't focused on anything. Her mind was still replaying snippets from her conversation with Voight, processing everything that had happened and was going to happen. Lines. FBI. New York. Not becoming him.

What was she supposed to have done? Just let Gael get away with everything? The Voight she'd met when she joined the unit would not have let this happen, he would have done what she had done. But now, maybe he was slowing down, maybe it was because of Al, or maybe he was getting better at hiding it. Regardless, she had done what needed to be done. And he was wrong, she wasn't going to become him. She had learnt from him sure, but she would be better than him.

Part of her had wanted to scream that back at him when he'd cleared his desk, but she'd stopped herself. Despite what he thought of her, she knew that some lines weren't worth crossing. But that meant her options were limited.

She couldn't get out of this trip, not without Voight getting rid of her. She knew he cared about her, but she also knew he'd kick her out in a heartbeat if he thought she was a liability. So she would do it, and she would do it damn well. If she got a glowing report, Voight would have to back off. And going forwards she would be more careful. She wouldn't end up like Voight, she wouldn't ever be arrested, she wouldn't lose someone because of something she had done. No, she would be in control of it all. Voight had a temper, it was one of his weaknesses, whereas she had learnt to control hers a long time ago. She never thought she'd be grateful to her father, but it turned out he had given her one useful skill in life.

Maybe Voight would come to see that too. If she could get him to see the value, they could make things so much better, but only time would tell on that front. For now, all she could do was go home and pack, and get ready to be the best version of herself for the FBI.

With her plan in place, she finally started the car, thankful no one had been around to see her, and drove home. Her thoughts about the FBI shifted quickly on the drive. She knew what she was going to do there, but that meant she had to tell people she was going. It would be easier for some. A text tomorrow morning would suffice for Kim, Kev, and Adam. She would tell Vanessa tonight, though she wasn't quite sure how yet. Her roommate had been through so much over the past few days, so it wasn't going to be easy. Vanessa would put up a front, pretend everything was fine, but she wasn't. Not yet anyway. Hailey could be there for her tonight though, show her that she did have people.

And then there was Jay. With everyone else she knew exactly what to do. With Jay, the one she knew the best out of all of them, she had no idea. She had been so focused on Voight and the situation that it was only now dawning on her that she wouldn't get to see Jay for the foreseeable future. He wouldn't bring her coffee in the morning, he wouldn't smile at her or make a stupid joke, he wouldn't pull her aside to confide in her about a case, and they wouldn't do their thing.

Hailey let out a deep breath and ran a hand over her face once she'd parked the car. She had to tell him, and it had to be in person. He'd told her once, after a particularly bad case and a couple of drinks, how Erin had left without even a goodbye, and she couldn't do that to him even if it was only for a few weeks. She had seen the aftermath first-hand and while their relationship was very different to his and Erin's, she was sure there was something there. She caught the way he watched her sometimes, she could recall all the things he did for her, and she remembered the hopeful look in his eyes when she had tried to tell him how she felt at the hospital before the phone interrupted and she realised it wasn't the right time. Just like this wasn't the right time either. Everything would be easier for now if they just carried on as is.

It hurt slightly, leaving could have been a good excuse to tell him the truth, but it was better she dealt with the feelings of loss rather than him. And hopefully the FBI gig would keep her so busy that she wouldn't have time to think about anything else. With her thoughts reasonably in check, and after realising that again she had been sat in the car for far too long, she got out and headed inside. It was time for part one of her leaving plan.

"Hailey!" Vanessa was in front of her before she had managed to close the front door. "Hey, did you hear? They got Gael; they found drugs in a trap in his car. They really got him, so Luis is gonna get the deal."

"That's great news," she told her, offering her a smile before closing the door and pulling off her coat. "I'm glad it worked out."

She gave Vanessa's shoulder a squeeze as she walked past her and into the kitchen. She should eat something first, let Vanessa keep her current mood for a little longer.

"You want something?" Vanessa asked, quickly moving around Hailey and to the other side of the kitchen counter. "I made a couple of things. Is there such a thing as stress cooking because I think that's what I was doing?"

"Hey," Hailey said, gaining Vanessa's attention. "It's going to be okay. He's got the deal."

"Yeah, just he was the one person who-" But she stopped as Hailey saw the tears forming in her eyes.

She'd heard what Reyes had said earlier, could imagine what was going through Vanessa's head, so she moved over and pulled her into her arms. "I know it's hard, but you're not the same person you were back then. What you and he went through, that's in the past. It sucks but the best thing you can do is move on from it."

"It's just…he was the closest thing I had to family…being alone…"

"Vanessa," she said as she pulled back and looked her in the eye. "You're not alone, you have us. The whole unit, that's your family now. They'll stick their nose in when you don't want them to, they'll annoy you sometimes, but every single one would bend over backwards to help you."

It took a moment, Vanessa wiped her eyes a few times, but then she nodded.

"Wanna surprise me with one of these meals you made?" Hailey asked, at the very least she could give Vanessa some normality before she broke the news.

"Yeah. Thanks, Hailey."

Vanessa didn't say anything more until she was dishing up their food. Hailey assumed she needed time to process everything so she let her have it as she took a seat and pulled out her phone. She composed the messages for Adam, Kev, and Kim, but made sure not to send them. The last thing she needed was one of them telling Vanessa or Jay before she could. At least with Vanessa she knew roughly what she was going to say but with Jay she still had no idea. She knew she should text him, make sure he was free so she could talk to him, or she could just show up unannounced like they tended to do to each other. She was so busy debating it that by the time Vanessa set a plate of food down in front of her, all she had managed to do was open a message to Jay and write the word 'hey'.

"Jay huh?" Vanessa said, seeming more upbeat than before. "Was wondering why you looked so focused."

Hailey shook her head and placed her phone down on the table. "I just need to know something about an old case."

"So that's why you've been staring at it for five minutes straight. Can't work out how to ask him about this old case?"

Hailey ignored her as she dug into the food. "This is great."

"You're deflecting."

"There's just nothing to talk about."

Vanessa laughed. "Oh there is so much to talk about. Not sure what it will take though as apparently him being shot wasn't enough."

"Vanessa." Her tone along with the look she gave her roommate would be enough to get the message across.

"Okay, keep doing it your way."

Hailey got the conversation back on to food at that point, and other inane topics. It was nice to laugh and forget about everything for half an hour, though once they finished Hailey knew she had to get back to reality. She thanked Vanessa again for the food but had to decline her offer to watch a movie, saying she had some things to sort out. She was sure she heard Vanessa mutter something about Jay and the old case, but she ignored it as she headed to her room and started packing. She didn't know how long she would need with Vanessa and Jay so getting this out of the way was the easiest thing for now.

She was most the way through, having selected all of her clothes and packed them in the suitcase, before she heard Vanessa's voice.

"I know you're busy, but there's dessert," Vanessa said as she walked into Hailey's room, the smile dropping from her face as soon as she saw the suitcase. "You going somewhere?"

Hailey nodded and took a seat on the bed, forcing herself to look happy. This needed to be positive news. "There's a taskforce in New York. The FBI need an officer on loan and Voight chose me."

She didn't know what she expected from Vanessa, but as soon as she saw the smile back on Vanessa's face, she knew she'd done the right thing.

"Hailey, that's amazing news. Being picked for the FBI. When are you going? What's the taskforce? How long is it for? Oh also-"

Hailey couldn't help but laugh as she held a hand up to halt her friend. "One at a time maybe. But in answer to your questions. I'm flying tomorrow morning. Not clear on the details yet, they'll fill me in tomorrow, and it's supposed to be a few weeks."

"Okay. I'll take care of everything here, you don't need to worry about a thing."

"I know."

"And I'll need details when you're back, you gotta tell me how the FBI rolls."

"You wanna join the FBI?"

"I dunno, maybe. Always good to have options, right? I mean an FBI taskforce has got to be good. Bet everyone else is gonna be jealous, I know I am."

"Yeah," she said, her happy facade faltering slightly. There was one person who probably wouldn't be as enthusiastic. She knew she wouldn't be if the roles were reversed.

"I take it you haven't told him yet," Vanessa said, causing Hailey to shake her head. There was no point pretending not to know who he was. "It's only a few weeks though."

"Yeah," she said, forcing the thoughts away. "It'll be good."

"Yeah, it sounds like a great opportunity." More like a great punishment, but only she and Voight would know that. For everyone else, it was just as Vanessa stated. "Well, I'll let you get on with this, but when you want dessert, just let me know and I'll get it ready."

Hailey thanked her friend, making sure to keep up the positive attitude until she was certain she was gone. Once there was no way Vanessa could see her, she closed her eyes and fell back onto the bed. Part of her wanted to scream, part of her wanted to cry, and part of her wanted to say to hell with it all. She gave each part its time internally as she placed her hands over her face and tried to take some deep breaths. Once she was done, she forced herself to get up and finish. She didn't have long left and there was still something she had to do.

Without letting herself overthink it, she sent Jay a message, asking if he was still up and if she could come over. He replied almost instantly to say yes and ask if everything was okay. She lied, saying she was fine, and that she would be over in thirty minutes.

Given the time limit she had set herself to ensure she didn't chicken out, she quickly finished off packing her suitcase and wheeled it to the door, ready for tomorrow morning.

"Does that mean you're ready for dessert?" Vanessa asked, popping her head out from the kitchen.

"Uh, no sorry, I've got to take care of something else."

Vanessa nodded before walking over and pulling her into a hug. "Have a good trip."

"You know I'll see you in the morning," she said as she hugged her friend back.

Vanessa shrugged. "Just in case you don't."

Hailey wasn't sure what else to say so waved her friend off as she headed out to the car. The traffic between hers and Jay's was non-existent so she ended up at his a little earlier than intended, but she knew he wouldn't mind. She considered using the extra few minutes to work out what to say, but in the end she knew she was better just doing it. This was one of the times when planning was unlikely to help.

Jay answered on her third knock, she had a feeling he had been waiting. Likely her text had worried him because for some reason turning up unannounced was more normal behaviour for them.

"You okay?" he asked, clearly looking her over for a sign of what was going on.

"I'm fine, Jay," she told him as she walked in, took her coat off, and hung it up.

"Why do I think that's not true?" he asked as she headed over to his couch, not wanting to face him yet.

She heard him moving around behind her, then the fridge, the bottles being opened, and finally footsteps coming towards her.

"Here."

She took the beer with a thanks; she would allow herself one, it had been a hell of a day, but that was it. She still had to drive later.

"So what's going on?" he asked. "Something with Gael?"

Jay didn't know. Of course he didn't, he'd headed home like the rest of the unit once they thought they were done. She had been the one to stick around and finish it.

"They caught Gael with two bricks in his car. He's going down and Reyes is getting the deal," she told him, keeping her eyes on the bottle in her hands.

Jay was silent for a few moments but then he spoke. "That seems like good news."

"It is." Gael deserved everything he got.

"So what's the bad news?"

"I'm going to New York. Tomorrow," she said as she finally turned to look at him, seeing the confusion on his face. "There's an FBI taskforce and they needed an officer."

"How long?"

"Few weeks."

Jay didn't speak, instead he took a long sip of his beer.

"It's a good opportunity," he told her finally.

She nodded, Rojas had been a lot more convincing, but then Rojas believed it was some sort of reward. Jay, on the other hand, probably had a better idea of what was really going on. She could have spared him it, pretended that she was excited for the job, that she wanted to do it, but that's not what she needed.

"I didn't choose it. Voight sprung it on me a couple of hours ago."

"He tell you why?"

A few lies came to mind, or things vague enough to avoid a conversation she didn't think she was ready to have, but then another thought popped up. Voight had said she didn't know how to be herself, that she was turning into him, but she knew Voight wouldn't do this.

"He's worried I'm turning into him, thinks this will help."

Jay took a few moments to process her words. She took a sip of her beer and leant back against the couch as she waited. He would confirm what she knew, she was sure of it.

"You're not him." She smiled; it was exactly as she suspected. "But what happened with Darius, with Gael. Those are Voight moves, no doubt about it."

"Jay-"

"I'm not stupid, Hailey. I can put two and two together," he told her as she bit her tongue. "Look, I'm not going to ask for details for both our sakes, but I'm here for you. If you want to talk about it, I will listen. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, you call me, and I will be there. You've been there for me enough, you've called me out, tried to stop me doing stupid things. This is me doing the same for you."

Hailey closed her eyes for a moment, going over his words. She wouldn't go into details, it was better for him not to know specifics, besides he clearly already had a good idea of the situation. Him backing up Voight though, that was a concern. She was still so sure she had done the right thing, but when she asked herself if Jay would have done the same thing, she knew the answer was no. He would have worked the case in his own time, followed more leads, probably put himself in danger, but he would have gotten them properly.

"Hailey?" She reopened her eyes as she felt his hand on her forearm. He was closer now, the worry etched on his face. "You know this doesn't change anything right? I still trust you more than anyone else, I would still follow you anywhere."

"Even New York?" she asked, gaining a smile in return.

"Even New York," he said as he moved his hand down her arm and took hold of her hand. "You can't get rid of me easily. Would be awkward if we showed up the FBI though, maybe that's why they only want one officer."

"Yeah," she muttered, wrapping her fingers around his.

Normally she wouldn't let them get this close, it made it harder to ignore the feelings she had locked away, but she was willing to make an exception just this once. She still owed him more of an explanation after all.

It took a while, but Hailey finally managed to talk about what had happened since Cameron's death. She had kept her guard up more when her and Jay had talked about it previously. This time though, she allowed herself to be more honest, more vulnerable. She avoided specific details though, like Jay had said, he wasn't stupid, and she wanted to ensure he still had deniability if anything were ever to happen. Jay had listened, had talked it out with her. He'd even opened up more about some of his recent struggles, like his near-death experience and the case with Michelle and Shane.

They had talked late into the night until Hailey had caught sight of the clock at one in the morning. Given her flight was at eight, she knew she had to head back and get some sleep. Before she had gone though, Jay had told her that he would give her a lift to the airport. She had considered declining his offer, but in the end she had thanked him. It had been a draining evening for both of them, but also cathartic. She wasn't sure when they would get to do it next, but having a bit more time with Jay tomorrow, without such a heavy conversation, was something she was already looking forward to.

* * *

Just as Jay had promised, he arrived at 6am to pick her up. She said another quick goodbye to Vanessa who was getting ready for work, before wheeling her suitcase over to the truck. Once it was loaded in the back and she was seated inside, Jay handed her a coffee.

"Thanks," she said, it was just what she needed given how little sleep she had gotten. "For this, for driving me."

"What are partners for?" he said as he pulled out onto the road. "Oh and just so you know, if I get stuck in a van with Adam while you're gone, I'm one hundred percent blaming you no matter how great this taskforce is."

Hailey laughed while doing her best to push back the feelings threatening to surface. She couldn't deal with them now. She just needed this to be normal.

"At least you know what Adam is like. I could get stuck with anyone."

"True. Though you might actually like your new partner. Just imagine if they're as amazing as me?"

That would be hard, but instead of speaking she just shook her head slightly.

"You're right, no one is as amazing as me."

"Okay, just make sure Voight doesn't give my seat away," she told him.

"I'll guard it with my life. And I expect you back in it soon, even if I have to come get you myself."

Hailey kept her eyes on him, a smile playing on her lips. When he pulled up at the lights, he turned to face her.

"What?"

"It's sweet."

"What?"

"You're gonna miss me," she teased, causing a smile to appear on his face.

"You're gonna miss me too."

Of course she was, more than she could tell him, but they couldn't do this now. Thankfully Hailey's phone went before it turned into an awkward silence. She gave him an apologetic look as she answered the phone, it was Voight. He wanted to give her some extra details he had received from the FBI; the name of the person coming to meet her at the airport and some background reading to do on the plane. By the time she had finished the call, and after a reminder from Voight to play by the FBI's rules, Hailey realised they were at the airport.

"Voight had some more info," she said as she unclipped her seatbelt and shoved the phone into her pocket.

"Yeah," Jay said, holding her gaze for a few moments. "Let me get your bag."

Maybe she was reading it wrong, but she was sure he had wanted to say something else. Still, she had done that enough times so just gave a nod instead of saying anything else. It was enough to get them both out of the truck and walking round to the back. Jay pulled her suitcase out and set it down on the ground next to her before pulling out the handle and handing it over to her. She took it with a thanks, her hand brushing against his slightly. Part of her wanted to grab his hand or to say something meaningful, but she couldn't do it.

"I should get going," she told him. "I'll see you soon."

"Yeah."

She allowed a few seconds, keeping her eyes on his, before turning around and walking to the entrance. Neither of them had ever been good with this stuff, at least not with each other. So as much as she wanted to give him a hug or something more than 'I'll see you soon', she carried on.

"Hey," Jay called out. Hailey paused almost instantly, taking a deep breath before turning back to see him walking over to her.

"What-"

But she didn't have a chance to finish as Jay pulled her into a hug. Instinctively she let go of her suitcase and wrapped her arms around him.

"You show them how it's done there," he said, still firmly holding onto her. "Show them they haven't got anything on Intelligence."

She nodded against his chest, taking in everything about the moment; the way he felt, strong and gentle at the same time. The way he smelt, like soap and coffee. The way he spoke, his voice lower than normal, but still reassuring.

"But don't be too good, can't have them wanting to poach you. I'm thinking go about eighty percent of your normal capacity."

She smiled then, a genuine smile, because while she couldn't say it out loud, it was things like this that made her realise how much she loved him.

"And be safe," he told her as he finally loosened his grip on her, causing Hailey to do the same. It was just bad timing. She couldn't tell him now.

"Look who's talking?" she said as she took a step back, seeing the grin on Jay's face.

"I promise to be careful."

"And you'll call me if you need to do our thing?"

"Only if you promise to do the same," he said, causing Hailey to nod as she grabbed hold of her suitcase before turning back to the entrance.

It was only a few weeks.


	2. Chapter 2

"Right. Beer or you want something else?" OA asked once they had grabbed a table at the bar he had chosen.

"Beer's good," she said as she pulled off her coat and took a seat.

She would have one, get to know her new partner a little better. They were going to be working together for a while and finishing up this assignment with some friends would certainly help her situation with Voight. The fact that OA had called her out when she mentioned breaking the racist's arm was probably exactly what Voight wanted. As he'd told her before she left, the lines were a lot clearer here, and it had become apparent during this case that her usual ways of working weren't always compatible. So she would have to go with the FBI way for now. She wasn't sure if it would stick when she got back to Chicago, but she was at least willing to trial it here.

Not wanting to dwell on the matter any further, Hailey pulled out her phone and checked her messages. Instinctively her eyes went to Jay's name, but there was nothing new. They were in the middle of a case so it wasn't unexpected, but part of her had still hoped for something. Vanessa, on the other hand, had sent her a couple of messages. The first was from this morning, asking how the taskforce was going. The second was from an hour ago, asking how to get on Jay's good side because apparently he was in a bad mood and she was going to be stuck in a van with him later that evening for a stakeout.

Hailey felt a small smile forming at that point. She could just imagine the two of them, Vanessa trying to make conversation and Jay brushing her off. She was a little concerned about his mood, but he would have told her if it was anything serious. They had promised to call if either of them needed to do their thing, so maybe he would call her later. She considered sending him a message to see how he was doing but decided she was better off helping her roommate for now.

She sent Vanessa a message to say that the task force was going well, that they had just finished their first case and she was out for a drink with her new partner. Then she sent her a link to a restaurant and another message telling her what Jay would want along with the advice that she could grab them some food before the stakeout. She also mentioned that Vanessa didn't need to fill all the silences when partnered with Jay. Jay could be stubborn but if he had some of his favourite food and wasn't being forced to talk, he would likely lighten up a bit.

"Here we go," OA said, setting the bottle down in front of her as she put her phone down on the table. "To saving my life."

Hailey hesitated a moment. It wasn't a big deal, she had told him that earlier, but she guessed there was no harm.

"Yeah," she muttered as she tapped her bottle against his before taking a sip. One beer, one story, and then she could go back to her hotel. "So you gonna tell me this story then?"

"Wow, no small talk at all. You always this straight shooting?"

She nodded. "That a problem for you?"

"No," he told her with a smile. "Actually quite refreshing. There can be a lot of politics here."

She took a sip of beer, still looking at him expectantly.

"Not gonna engage me on that one?"

She smiled. "Nah, I'm gonna get the story of what made you become an agent first. We can do the work small talk after."

OA seemed amused but indulged her anyway. He told her about becoming a ranger, the DEA, and then being picked by the FBI. Hailey knew he was leaving out some parts, but she didn't blame him. It wasn't like she had given him a lot of details on her past, mostly she'd just provided him with surface information. It was enough though, enough to know that the other was legit and could get the job done.

From what Hailey had seen of him so far and from what he had told her, she trusted him as a temporary partner. She hadn't seen him operate in all situations, so she still needed to be cautious compared to Jay, but that was only natural. Her and Jay had spent years building their partnership and they were so in sync at work. Just a look from the other revealed exactly what they were thinking. It was extremely effective, even Voight couldn't deny that. Whereas with OA, she had to think about it, she-

"Hailey?" She snapped out of her thoughts as OA called her name and indicated to her phone, and the name flashing up on the screen. Jay Halstead.

She gave him an apologetic look as she grabbed her phone and answered it. It was probably nothing but with their job it could always be something.

"Hey, you alright?"

"Did you tell Rojas to bribe me?"

"What are you talking about?" she asked, a smile forming on her face because she already had a pretty good idea of the situation.

"She brought dinner. It was from the Greek place you found us last month and she knew exactly what to get. And now she's gone to get us coffee before the stakeout. Oh, and she's been weirdly quiet for the last hour. So?"

Hailey could see OA pretending not to listen in. She guessed the grin on her face from the way Jay was talking was enough for him to know it wasn't serious, but she still needed to be careful with what she said around him.

"She said you weren't in the best mood and she wanted to help so I suggested some things. You know you could just thank her?"

"I already did," he said, pausing for a moment before continuing. "How's it going with you?"

She wanted to tell him everything, she wanted to spend the rest of the evening talking to him about what she had missed, about why he was in a bad mood, but it would have to wait. "It's going well, just finished our first case and celebrating with a beer."

"So you can't talk right now?"

OA was still watching her as she ran a hand through her hair. "Not really."

"Okay, Rojas will be back soon anyway. Gonna be a long night on this thing so…if you-"

"Yeah, I know." She would message him as soon as she finished this beer. They wouldn't be able to call while he was in the van with Rojas, but the occasional text would be okay. At the very least she could try to get to the bottom of his bad mood. "Stay safe, and don't be too hard on Vanessa."

"So don't get shot and make Rojas do all the paperwork?"

"You're not as funny as you think," she told him, the smile on her face saying otherwise.

"Whatever you say."

"Okay, I'm going now. Enjoy your stakeout."

"Hey. Thanks by the way," Jay said, causing her to keep the phone where it was. "For giving Rojas the suggestions."

"Anytime," she said before she hung up.

Hailey put the phone into her pocket, her mind filled with what she would say to Jay later until she looked up to see OA sipping his beer, still watching her. She probably should have been more careful around him. He didn't know Jay, didn't know what Jay had been saying, but he had seen her reaction to their phone call, and she wasn't sure she was comfortable with that.

"Just my partner, checking in about a case."

OA nodded as Hailey picked up her beer. A couple of large sips and it would be gone and then she could be gone.

"You been partnered for long?"

"Three years."

There was no harm in the facts, except then she remembered that she was dealing with an FBI agent, and they tended to read more into situations than the average person.

"Good partner?"

The best was what she wanted to say, but instead she just nodded as she finished up her beer. She thanked him for the drink and told him she needed to get back and crash before he had a chance to ask her anything else. She really had no intention of talking about Jay to him, and it had been a long day, so she really was tired. OA didn't seem to mind. He walked her out, told her to have a good night and that he would see her in the morning, before heading off.

It took Hailey half an hour to get back to her hotel, with a detour to grab some takeout on the way back. She hadn't eaten much all day and after hearing about Vanessa and Jay's dinner she was hungry. Once she had finished eating, she grabbed a shower before climbing into bed and checking her phone. She had text Jay as soon as she left the bar, but he hadn't responded yet. She knew he was busy, that he wouldn't jeopardise the operation by texting her, but she wasn't sure she would be able to stay awake much longer. After a few more minutes, she sent him a text, wishing him luck on the case and letting him know that she was going to bed, before setting her phone down and drifting off to sleep.

* * *

The following week was strangely similar to that night. Her and Jay's schedules never seemed to align properly. They were both working big cases which involved long hours and the few they did have off were spent sleeping. They still texted each other, still checked in, but there had been no more calls and the texts were becoming less frequent. Hailey knew it was mostly down to her, she was the one who took longer to respond, she was the one burying herself in work, but she couldn't stop herself.

They had been put onto a man named James Fuller. Hailey had met some bad people in her time, but he was really pushing to take the top spot. The man seemed to have a hand in everything. Drugs, guns, trafficking. Every time she thought the list would end, something else got added to it. They had been after him for over a week and kept hitting dead-end after dead-end. Everyone was getting frustrated, the meetings were getting a little briefer, the jokes which had been around the first few days had disappeared, and the weariness was starting to show on everyone's face.

It had started with a van of dead girls. A trafficking ring operating right here in New York. They had been given the case, it wasn't the best, but Hailey had seen similar before so she just got on with it. They started making progress, found the connections, found someone to flip, but then the bodies started to drop. First an OD, then a drunken car accident, then an accidental fire. None of them were accidents though, they were all certain of that, but finding proof for it was proving impossible. Fuller kept himself clear of everything, had at least two layers between him and those who were carrying out his acts.

After four days of failure, Hailey had felt the frustration getting to her so she had tried to work through it. She had spent one evening getting drinks with the team, she had spent another in the gym, but it hadn't worked so she had tried to call Jay. He had been working undercover which meant she hadn't managed to speak to him, so she had done what she thought he would do and had spent extra time on the case. That one at least made her feel like she was making progress, but then today had happened.

They had been given a tip off about a delivery. Pinning it to Fuller was just one part, the other was rescuing those being transported. Their informant had told them Fuller had been spooked and had ordered the delivery to be cancelled. Hailey hadn't been sure of what that meant to start with, but OA had brought her up to speed. He was cleaning his hands of it, abandoning it, which meant they were working against a clock.

Hailey had given everything she had to find the truck, to ensure they got there in time, but it hadn't been enough. She wasn't sure she would ever forget the images of the day. She wasn't frustrated anymore, she wasn't angry, she felt numb to it all, and that's when her brain had started working properly, putting a plan in place. She had tried it the FBI way, she really had, but it wasn't working.

She could make a difference though; she knew she could. This was what she had trained for, this was what she had learnt to do, and if there was ever a time to make use of her skill set, it was now. So that's why she had shut off her phone before she left the hotel this evening, that was why she had taken a bag containing blackout gear with her, and that was why she was sat in the car she had brought for $100 which no one knew about, watching the house across the street.

Hailey wasn't sure how long she had been here; she didn't want to risk checking her watch and miss something, but she knew it had to be hours. She had seen Fuller come home soon after she arrived. She had seen him greet his wife and kids at the door, playing the part of the family man, but he was so far away from that. She wondered if his wife knew what he was really like. The woman had to have some idea really, but people were always good at ignoring inconvenient parts of their lives.

No one would be able to ignore it for much longer though. Hailey wouldn't let them. Sure, the FBI were on this, but this guy was too careful. It was like déjà vu with Gael, he always had someone else do the dirty work. In a way it was worse though, Fuller had more deaths on his head. Flashes of the truck came to mind. Fifteen people had suffocated to death on his orders because he had gotten spooked. He could have cut them loose, but instead he'd let them die in a horrific manner.

Hailey took a deep breath, trying to push the memories away. She had held out some hope when they had first found the truck but as she moved from body to body, not finding a pulse, the reality had set in. It was finding the woman holding her baby that had really gotten to her though. She wasn't sure why, she had never been that maternal, had never pictured her future with a family or kids because it was always the job she saw, but something about the way the woman had cradled her child had stuck with her.

She had told everyone that she was fine when they asked, and when a team drink had been suggested, she had told them that she was tired and needed to sleep, but sleep was the last thing on her mind. She couldn't let this go, she couldn't just switch off right now like the rest of them, not after what they had seen today. Fuller had to be stopped and it was her job to stop him, whatever the cost.

With the thought clear in her mind, Hailey continued her silent vigil until finally it happened. The light in Fuller's bedroom went out. She checked the time then: 11:47. Half an hour and he would likely be asleep, and then she could make her move. She had studied his place enough, the FBI resources really helped with that. She knew about the three guards he had stationed in his house. She knew about the cameras. And she knew how to get into the garage without being seen.

After twenty minutes, she started getting ready. Full blackout gear was a must at this point, no way she could risk being identified if anything went wrong. Once she had the gloves on, she reached inside her duffle bag and pulled out a ziplock bag containing the gun. It had been wiped down, no way anyone would get any prints off it, but the ballistics would match the deaths of two of Fuller's men, Taylor had assured her of that. She knew he had been the one to pull the trigger but it was on Fuller's orders and they already had enough on Taylor, so what did it matter if Fuller, who really was responsible, took the fall for it when the gun was found in his car.

Hailey looked to the car's clock. It was time. She stashed the gun in one of the large pockets and placed her hand on the handle but froze as she heard a dog bark. Instinctively she sunk down in her seat, trying to locate the noise. It took a moment but then she saw it in the mirror. The dalmatian with its owner. They were heading into one of the other houses, clearly back from a late-night walk. A heavily pregnant woman greeted them on the doorstep, a kiss for the man, a scratch of the head for the dog, and then they were gone. Yet Hailey's eyes remained on the red door. The guy's jacket. It was the same one Jay wore.

What the hell was she doing? She had to get Fuller off the streets, it was the best thing she could do for everyone, but now thoughts of Jay were bombarding her, making her lose her focus. She tried to push them aside, tried to move her hand, but again found it frozen on the door handle as four words started repeating in her head. Those are Voight moves.

Jay had said that to her about the Gael and Darius, and she knew he would say the same about this. There was no way around it, she wouldn't pretend it was all okay, because what she was about to do was crossing a line. And despite what Voight had said to her before she left, she did know that, but she was choosing to cross that line because it saved lives. He had taught her that. Three years of Intelligence had taught her exactly what happened when you didn't cross the line. So how could she just let it go when she could do something about it?

The thoughts were starting to make sense, her internal reasoning clearing a path so she could focus on her task. If Fuller was stopped, people would live. People who were just trying to start a better life, like the mother and her child in the truck. They hadn't deserved to die, and she could stop others like them from having the same fate. That was her job after all, to protect people. Yet before she managed to pull on her balaclava, one last thought popped up.

If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, you call me, and I will be there.

The words from Jay echoed around her, the memory coming front and centre. She closed her eyes, trying to focus on something else, anything else, but all it did was allow her to see Jay's face better. He had been so concerned about her, his unspoken words had told her everything she needed to know that night. He hadn't lectured her or yelled at her, he'd just talked it through with her, listened to her, been there for her. She could still remember how he'd taken her hand, the show of solidarity had been exactly what she needed, because he always seemed to know what she needed.

Hailey blew out a long breath as she reopened her eyes and wiped away a few tears which had fallen. She missed him.

Things would have been better if he was here, she was sure of it. The case would likely be the same, but they would have gone through it together. And after today, after seeing what she had seen, Jay would have made sure they grabbed a drink so they could do their thing. He wouldn't have let her fob him off like she had earlier tonight, wouldn't have let her get away with saying she needed an early night because work was so busy. No, he would have seen straight through her. But he wasn't here so instead he'd accepted all of her recent excuses; she was texting less because of the volume of work, she was enjoying it but really needed some sleep because they were working her so hard, she couldn't talk about it because it was classified, she would call him when she got time.

The truth was she had been pushing him away recently because some part of her knew what she might have to do, and she wasn't sure she would be able to do it if she talked to him. But she had made a promise to him. A promise to call if she needed to do their thing.

It took a while, but eventually she pulled her hand from the door handle and started the car. She took one last look at the house, one last look at what she was giving up, before starting the engine. As much as she wanted to call him, she couldn't risk doing so from her current position. If things didn't work out, if she still had to go through with this at some point, she couldn't be traced back to Fuller's place at any time.

Hailey wasn't sure how long she drove for, she didn't know New York and she hadn't used her phone for directions for obvious reasons, so she kept going until she found somewhere near her hotel where she could get coffee from. She wasn't sure it was the best idea given the time, but she needed something right now and this was all she had. The place was dead, so after changing into her normal clothes, she quickly got a coffee to go and sat back in the car.

As soon as she was inside, she turned on her phone and found Jay's name. Her thumb hovered over the call button; she had no idea what she was going to say. She'd tried to think of things while she drove, but mostly she'd had to convince herself that this was the right thing to do.

Without allowing herself any more time to think about it, Hailey pushed the button and placed the phone to her ear. It rang at least five times before she heard his voice.

"Halstead."

He sounded tired; of course, she had woken him. "Jay."

"Hailey? Hey, what's going on?" he asked, suddenly sounding more awake. Hailey took a moment to compose herself. What the hell was she going to say now? "Hailey, are you okay?"

"No."


	3. Chapter 3

No. The word slipped out so easily in response to Jay's question. She wasn't sure why, but in that moment instead of going with her standard 'I'm fine', she had completely let her guard down.

"What's going on? Are you hurt?" he asked, the panic evident in his voice.

"No, no I'm fine."

Physically at least. Mentally was another story, but she had a feeling they were about to get to that.

"Hailey, it's-" He paused, she could hear him moving around as she leant back in her seat. "It's one in the morning. And you just said you weren't okay."

He had her on that. She couldn't pretend this was nothing. She had called him.

"Where are you?" Jay asked.

"At a diner, just grabbed a coffee," she answered automatically. She was somewhat grateful Jay hadn't jumped straight back to asking her what was wrong, it gave her time to work out how best to phrase it.

"Coffee at this time?" he asked, his voice edging to a more light-hearted tone, but she could still hear the underlying concern. "You working? Thought you were getting an early night."

She didn't respond, her mind was still trying to work out the exact words to use. There were so many possible outcomes to what she was about to tell him, especially if she phrased it in the wrong way.

"Hailey, please just tell me what's going on."

His voice was soft, just like it had been at the airport when he'd hugged her goodbye. She opened her mouth, but suddenly her throat felt incredibly dry. He would know she had lied to him; he would be disappointed in her, he-

"Hailey, talk to me. You can tell me anything, you know that."

She nodded to herself. She just had to do it.

"You said if I ever found myself in a similar situation, I should call you," she said, trying to stop her voice from wavering. "This is me calling you."

Jay was silent for a moment, clearly processing what she had said. He would know exactly what she was talking about, but he would also be careful about what he said next.

"Okay. Okay, you did the right thing." She wasn't sure about that. The truth was only time would tell now. "Have you done anything yet? Aside from getting coffee?"

It wasn't like anyone had any reason to monitor either of their phones, but it was best that they didn't say anything incriminating, and they knew each other well enough that they didn't need to spell anything out.

"I went for a drive, thought about things. Then I decided to grab a coffee and call you."

"And it's the case, right?" Jay asked. "The reason why you can't sleep?"

She felt the stinging sensation in her eyes as the memories of the truck came back. The woman slumped against the wall; the kid clutched in her arms. "Yeah. It's bad. Today…today we were too late. I don't want to be too late again."

"I get it. I do. But you know we can't always control these things," he said as she tried desperately to stop any tears from falling.

He was right, she couldn't control what had happened today, but she could control next time. She had a plan, a good plan, and it would work, she was sure of it.

"I should do more though. I should stop him."

Jay didn't know many details of the case, she wasn't allowed to tell him, but he knew they were after someone who had done some horrific things.

"I know you want to. I get where you're coming from, I really do. And if I know anything about you, I'm sure you're already doing more than is expected, more than most other cops would do. But you can't go on like this," Jay said. "You've been there when I've had cases hit me, and you always call me out on getting too involved. You recite laws to me, you remind me why we do our jobs, you tell me how people will see it, and then you tell me to let it go. And you know what? As much as I hate it at the time, you are always right."

She closed her eyes as she considered his words. Thoughts of Camila Vega and Matthew Garrett came to mind first, but they were soon replaced by memories of Angela and his shooting. Finding him bloodied and beaten, the gunshot, and the waiting.

"Hailey, I know you don't want to hear it, I know you want to do it your new way, but that's not you. Not really. The fact that you called me, that's proof enough to me that you know that too."

Maybe he was right. If she'd stuck to her original plan, she would be done by now and Jay would be none the wiser. Yet she had made the decision to stop and call him. She knew he'd talk her out of it, just like she had tried to do with him in the past. And that part stuck with her the most. If she was brutally honest with herself, she knew that even a year ago she wouldn't have ever seriously considered some of her recent decisions, let alone acted on them.

"Yeah. I just." She paused as she reopened her eyes and looked around the deserted carpark. "I don't even know what I'm supposed to do right now. Everything feels…messy."

"Been there. Had this stubborn partner who wouldn't let me go through it alone though," he said, bringing a small smile to Hailey's face. "We're gonna get through this. Okay?"

"Okay."

She trusted him, more than she had ever trusted anyone else in her life. It scared her a bit, but right now it was probably the best thing. Like she'd said, everything felt messy, so allowing him to act as her conscious would relieve some of the strain.

"So what do we do now?" she asked.

"Well first you ditch that coffee and head back to your hotel," he told her as she looked to the cup in the holder. She hadn't drunken any. "And don't even think about hanging up. I'm staying on the line the whole time."

"Hope you're not expecting any riveting conversations," she told him as she started the car.

"Don't worry. I've got a week's worth of Intelligence work to catch you up on so you can just listen to my wonderful voice," he said, causing a full smile to finally grace her face.

"Thanks by the way."

"Oh don't thank me yet. You haven't heard the stories."

* * *

The stories had been relatively mundane, but Hailey had been grateful for them all the same. They had brought her closer to some semblance of her previous self. So that evening, after Jay was sure she was back in her hotel room, she had managed to sleep through the night without any thoughts about Fuller. She had sent Jay a text the following morning before she headed to the office, thanking him again, especially after what time they had both ended up going to sleep.

Jay had told her not to worry about it, that all she had to do was go to work and do it by the book, and also be free that evening because he was calling again with more stories. It was something to look forward to, something to keep her grounded, so she'd done the work. They still didn't manage to catch Fuller that day, but for the first time in a while, she felt okay when she left. And that evening she had let Jay tell her more stupidly monotonous stories. It would probably sound crazy to anyone else, but it just worked for them.

So for the second day in a row Hailey went to work in something of a good mood, but unfortunately it hadn't lasted. That day they had four bodies. Two had been tortured beyond recognition and the other two had been burnt alive. The smell had haunted Hailey all day, she hadn't managed to eat a thing, but she'd carried on working it the right way. She wasn't sure they got any closer that day, but she hadn't stuck around, needing to get back to her hotel and take a shower.

Jay had called her again that night, but she'd kept the conversation short, saying she wanted to catch up on her sleep. She had heard the concern in Jay's voice when he'd tried to talk more seriously with her, but after she assured him multiple times that it really was tiredness and that she would call him tomorrow, he'd let her go. It wasn't a lie really, she was tired, and she did want to sleep, but her brain was stirring up previous thoughts. She still had options.

Hailey had hoped that having those options would help her when she finally did close her eyes for the night, but it seemed her mind was too consumed. Her dreams, or nightmares really, were filled with the images of the bodies they'd found that day. In the end she gave up trying to sleep and spent the time researching other options. By the time she turned up for work, after too many coffees and assuring Jay by text that she was fine, she shared some of her ideas with OA. He was on board straight away, as desperate as the rest of them to get to Fuller.

Her first idea was to use Tanya, one of the girls she had managed to flip the other day, to get to one of Fuller's lieutenants. It was a little risky but if they could flip the lieutenant, they may have a way in. Things seemed to be going well to start with, OA even cracked a smile at one point when the lieutenant incriminated himself on the wire. Yet once they'd scooped him up and Hailey had gone to thank Tanya and let her know that she was in the clear, things had gone downhill fast.

It was the kid's bodies she had found first. Two kids, both under the age of ten, executed and left in the living room as the TV played cartoons in the background. Hailey had felt the emotions racing through her at first, but she'd forced them away and embraced the numbness again as she and OA finished clearing the house. She had found Tanya's body upstairs in a bedroom. The woman had clearly been tortured before being executed, and Hailey knew that was on her.

"Upton, we're going for a drink," OA called out, forcing Hailey to pull her eyes away from the monitor and the images of Tanya's house.

"I can't, I have plans," she said, forcing on her professional work smile.

It was the one which meant people didn't question how badly this case was really affecting her because she still seemed relatively normal. Though in this instance, it appeared that OA was a little less convinced because instead of accepting her answer, he headed over to her.

"It's been a shit day and team drinks help. What else are you going to do? Stew in a hotel room?"

She was about to tell him no, lie about some imaginary plans, but then her phone started ringing. She checked the name, a genuine smile coming to her face because Jay's timing could not have been any better.

"My plans." She turned the phone so OA could see for himself. "He also doesn't want me to stew in a hotel room."

"Smart man," OA said as Hailey nodded.

She didn't care what OA thought about her relationship with Jay anymore. All she cared about right now was that he believed she was going back to her hotel to spend the evening talking on the phone with her partner.

"Well in that case, I'll see you tomorrow," he said and walked away.

Hailey waited until OA was out of sight before declining the call from Jay. As soon as she'd seen the bodies of the two kids and Tanya, she'd made up her mind. She was going to end this thing tonight.

After pocketing her phone, she switched off her PC and grabbed her bag. As she was heading to the exit, and the car the FBI had loaned her, her phone started ringing. It was Jay again. But again she ignored it, she had to focus now.

The drive back to the hotel was quick, but she didn't bother to go up to her room. Instead she checked her phone, seeing a message from Jay, asking her to call him, before switching it off. She was sure it was nothing serious, just him wanting to check in on her like he had the past few days, so she put it away, grabbed the black duffle bag, and walked out of the parking lot. Two blocks away, she got into the other car she had acquired, the one that no one knew about, and the one which was parked on a street with no camera coverage. Once she was inside, she quickly changed into her blackout gear and put her office clothes away in the duffle bag. It was time.

She checked around, ensuring there was still no one about, before starting the car and pulling out onto the road. It didn't take long to get there; the evening traffic had already died down, which wasn't a bad thing. She would probably still have to wait a few hours to make her move, but it wasn't like she had anything else to do. As with the times before, there was enough space for her to park on the opposite side of the street and maintain a good line of sight on the property. The lights were on in several rooms of the house, so Hailey just watched and waited.

Around an hour later, Hailey saw more movement in the house than she had expected. She wasn't sure what was going on, but a minute later Fuller came out with two of his guys and headed to the garage. Hailey watched intently, praying that what she thought was about to happen was not actually going to happen, but then it did. The gate opened and Fuller's car came out, driving straight past her.

All she could do was watch it drive away in her rear-view mirror before putting her head in her hands. She couldn't follow them, they weren't stupid, they would notice a single car tailing them. And it wasn't like she knew where they were heading, what they were up to, or had any way to track them. That was it. Her opportunity to plant the gun had just disappeared down the road.

For a moment she considered putting it somewhere else. Somewhere in the house that she could get to, but then she decided against it. It was too risky. She had planned to put it in the car, that was the sensible move here, and she wasn't going to risk something she hadn't prepped for. So what was she supposed to do now? Wait? Hope that they came back soon so she could finish this?

Hailey shook her head, silently cursing. They could be gone for hours or all night, and as much as she wanted to wait until they got back, her gut instinct was to call it for tonight. She had to be alert enough to carry this out and she knew she was running on empty after last night. She should go back to her hotel and sleep, and then tomorrow, straight after work, she would come back here and get it done. She hated the idea of waiting another day, but after debating it for a while she knew it was the right move.

With one last glance at the house, she started the car and made the drive back towards her hotel. She parked up at the same spot she had before, but she didn't bother changing back into her office clothes. Instead she threw on her winter coat, gloves, and hat. It was dark; people wouldn't pay attention to what she was wearing, especially given that her coat covered the majority of the unusual attire.

After grabbing the bag and locking the car, Hailey headed to the hotel and up to her room. She opened the door, ready for the day to be over, ready to get changed and pass out. She wasn't sure if the memories would let her sleep, but she was exhausted enough that they might not be able to stop her. Except once she stepped inside, she found herself frozen in place because her room wasn't as she had left it this morning. There was a bag she didn't recognise on the floor, and a few meters away, sat on the edge of her bed, was Jay.

He locked eyes with her immediately as he slipped his phone into his pocket. She thought she might be hallucinating or dreaming for a moment, but then he spoke.

"We need to talk."


	4. Chapter 4

Hailey held Jay's gaze for a few moments. She hadn't seen this coming; he was supposed to be in Chicago working, not sitting on her bed, waiting for her in her hotel room.

"What are you doing here, Jay?" she asked as she closed the door, dropped her bag onto the floor, and walked further into the room.

His expression was somewhere between disbelief and concern. "You wouldn't answer my calls."

"So you flew out here?" Her tone was harsher than she had intended, but this was not part of her plan.

"Yeah," he said as she pulled off her coat, gloves, and hat, and dumped them on the chair. "I was worried about you."

"I'm fine," she told him as she bent down and undid her boots.

By the time she had taken them off and stood upright, he was next to her. She hated the way he was looking at her; she hated everything about this situation. All she wanted to do was to crawl into bed and forget about the world for a while, but that seemed unlikely given the way Jay was staring at her.

"Hailey. Hey, this." He indicated to her attire and the state of her room. "This is not fine."

"It's been busy."

He shook his head. "This isn't busy. This is self-destructive. Trust me; I know what it looks like."

Instinctively she bit her tongue, considering her words, as she swept her eyes around the room. She could see where he was coming from; she was in blackout gear, not really FBI office attire, and her room had certainly seen better days. The do not disturb sign had been hung on the door a week ago, and there were clothes and takeout containers strewn about the place. But this was different to when he'd started to self-destruct. She had a plan. She knew how to fix things, how to get things back to some semblance of normalcy.

"Hailey, we have to talk about this," he said, catching her eye once she'd finished her self-assessment. "You called me remember? You-"

"I never asked you to come here."

Again the tone was harsher than she had intended, but she didn't want him seeing her like this. She needed to keep her mind clear and focused on the plan. Once she was done with it, then she could go back to Chicago and face him, but not here. Not now.

Jay opened his mouth but seemed to reconsider whatever he was going to say. He probably wanted to yell back at her, tell her she was being stupid, but he knew it wouldn't help. Given her childhood, the only thing yelling achieved was causing her to shut down, and that clearly wasn't what Jay wanted.

"You're right. You didn't ask me, but I came anyway because I…"

But he stopped, so Hailey found herself prompting him. "Because you what?"

"Because I care about you and I didn't want you to do something stupid," he told her before looking her over. "Not sure if I'm too late for that though."

"I haven't done anything."

She would have. If Fuller had stuck to his usual routine, she would have gone through with it, but telling Jay that piece of information was not going to help the current situation.

"Okay, so do you want to tell me where you were and what you were doing then?"

"Not really."

He nodded before walking past her. For a second she thought she had pushed him too far, that he was going to leave, but when she turned around he was picking up her bag.

"Jay." She shook her head, pleading with him not to continue. "Just leave it."

He let out a deep breath, still holding onto the bag. "You going to tell me what happened?"

Her hesitation was enough to get Jay walking over to the bed with the bag. Part of her was internally screaming to do something, to stop this. The other part felt frozen in place. He was already assuming the worst so what did it matter if he looked inside and saw the gun?

Yet after he'd set the bag down on the bed and was pulling on the zipper, Hailey found herself acting on instinct. She swiftly moved over to him and grabbed his hands, stopping him from unzipping the bag fully.

"Please don't." She could feel the tears forming in the back of her eyes as she kept her hands wrapped tightly around his. "You know what Voight says. You never have to explain something you didn't see."

Jay looked to her and then the bag. He repeated the process a few times before bowing his head slightly, though he still had hold of the zipper. She could see the conflict playing out on his face, but she couldn't let him become even more involved, for his own sake.

Eventually she managed to pry both of his hands off the bag and have him turn to face her. A couple of tears escaped from her eyes, but she let them roll down her cheeks. She knew what she had to do.

"It was just like the other night, okay? I went for a drive, but I didn't do anything."

Jay held her gaze for a moment. As much as she wanted to cover it up, pretend that she was fine, she had to let him see her like this. Seeing how broken she really was...it was the only way he would know she was telling the truth.

"You're ready to though," he said when he finally spoke.

She felt another tear roll down her face. "Yeah."

There was silence in the room at that point, both contemplating their options. Hailey considered saying more, but the truth was she just wanted this conversation to be over. As she felt another tear threatening to escape, she freed one of her hands from Jay's and wiped it across her face. She felt Jay hold onto her remaining hand a little tighter, but she couldn't give him what he wanted. She couldn't tell him the truth; she couldn't allow him to become any more involved than he already was or he would be just as liable if anything went wrong. And she would never let him go down for her. Not like Al had gone down for Voight.

"Look, I appreciate you coming, but it's late and I could really use some sleep so…"

She trailed off, hoping Jay would take the hint, but he showed no signs of moving.

"Hailey, we have to talk about this more. You can't pretend that this is normal," he said, gesturing to the bag. "And you can't tell me you're really just going to fall asleep given everything that's going on."

She shrugged as she removed her hand from his and grabbed the bag. She zipped it back up and moved over to the cupboards. Once she had stored it safely inside, she turned back to find Jay had followed her. She wasn't sure if his positioning was deliberate, if he thought she might run off, but he was stood between her and the door to the room.

"I'm gonna get ready for bed," she told him as she moved back over to the bed and grabbed her pyjamas from where she had dumped them this morning. He was right, she wasn't sure if she would be able to sleep given everything that had happened, but she would try. Really it was the only thing she did want to try right now.

"Hailey."

He looked pissed off, but she really didn't have the energy to get into this any further. She locked eyes with him for a moment, saw him willing her to speak, but instead she just pulled her top over her head. She didn't care anymore.

Jay let out a sigh in response before turning around. Of course, even when angry he was still a good guy.

"Okay, you don't wanna talk about it anymore. I'll talk," he said as Hailey continued to get changed, every now and again glancing at Jay's back. Even from behind she could detect the rising levels of annoyance. "I'm not gonna pretend to know exactly what you're going through. I get that it's tough, I get that this case is the worst and you want to stop him. But I'm not going to let you throw everything away for it. So you can ignore me, you can lie to me, but I'm not going to let you do this."

There was silence for a few moments as Hailey took in his words. She didn't know what he wanted her to say, didn't know what she could say that wouldn't make things worse, so instead she walked around the bed, past him, and into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. She didn't want to act like this with Jay, but she couldn't stop herself.

"Hailey." She heard his voice after a minute; she guessed he was right outside the bathroom door. "Please don't shut me out. Whatever this is, we can work through it. We're partners. Think of everything you've done for me, every time you called me out, every time you stopped me doing something stupid."

She finished brushing her teeth and exited the bathroom, coming face to face with him. He was a mix of emotions and she could read every one of them; angry, scared, hurt. Part of her wanted to say something to ease the suffering she was causing him, but she was worried what she would say if she did open her mouth, so instead she kept quiet as she went to move past him. Yet she didn't get far as Jay grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks.

"You want to keep ignoring me? Fine. You don't want to talk? Great, I'll keep talking. But I'm still not going anywhere. No matter what happens, I'm going to help you do the right thing."

"The right thing?" she snapped, for some reason she couldn't keep it bottled up anymore. "I tried doing the right thing. Three days ago, I called you because I thought it was the right thing. I listened to you; I followed all the rules, I did everything by the book, and do you know what happened?"

Jay was silent, his hand still firmly holding onto her arm, but his eyes speaking volumes. He knew the answer, he would have seen the news, but she couldn't stop herself.

"Seven more bodies. That's exactly what doing the right thing got. Seven innocent people dead. And you know today, today it was two kids and their mother."

"That's not on you."

"Of course it is," she said, her voice louder than before. "I could have stopped it. I had the chance to put an end to it and I didn't take it. Instead I called you. So those seven, they're on me. Those kids, they're on me!"

Jay shook his head as she continued to hold his gaze. She was not backing down; nothing he could say was going to change the facts. If she had planted the gun three days ago, Fuller would be in prison. And Tanya, her kids, the others, they would be alive.

"You can't do this to yourself," he said. "You have no idea what would have happened. Even if he had been arrested days ago, he still could have made calls. Hell, someone else in his organisation could have made decisions and maybe more people would be dead."

"You don't know that."

"And neither do you," he shot back at her.

Hailey gave up on her staring match at that point and bowed her head slightly. She was done talking. As she looked down, she saw Jay's hand still holding onto her. She moved her free hand and gently removed it from her arm before looking back at him. "I'm going to bed."

She saw the hurt in his eyes, but quickly moved past him and over to the bed. Her day had been bad enough already. She didn't want to fight with Jay anymore, and the only way she could see to stop it was to just stop talking.

She wasn't sure what Jay would do but she couldn't dwell on it. Instead she climbed into bed on the furthest side, keeping her back to Jay, and rested her head on the pillow. Her eyes remained open, staring at the wall in front of her as she tried to clear her mind. She was too frustrated to sleep.

A minute or so later, she heard Jay moving around, getting closer to her. And then he was crouching down next to her. He didn't seem mad or annoyed anymore. If anything, he seemed defeated.

"What time is your alarm set for?" She hated seeing him like this, hated that she was responsible. "Hailey?"

"Six," she said, forcing herself to stop the silent treatment. He didn't deserve it; he was only trying to help after all.

"What time are you heading in for?"

"Half seven."

He nodded before reaching out and taking hold of the hand she had resting on the pillow. "I'll be back here at six then. I'll bring breakfast. And I'm gonna give you a ride to work tomorrow, and then as soon as you're finished, I'm picking you up and we can get dinner, or we can come back here. I don't mind. We can sit in silence for the whole thing if you want or you can yell at me some more. But whenever you wanna talk about this properly, I'll be here."

Her instinct was to push him away, she didn't want him getting caught up in any of this, but she really didn't want to fight anymore. In the end, she gave a nod as she squeezed his hand. It was the most she could manage, but it seemed to be enough for Jay. For the first time since she had seen him, he offered her a small smile.

"Okay, you get some sleep," he told her as he let go of her hand and stood up.

He held her gaze for a second before turning around and walking out of sight. Hailey knew she could keep quiet and let him leave, but she found herself rolling over and calling out his name. She could make small talk for a few more minutes; let them both leave this in a better mood.

"Yeah," he said as he turned back to her, his bag in hand.

"Where are you staying?"

He rubbed at the back of his neck with his free hand. "I don't know yet. They're all booked up here, but I'll find somewhere."

"You came all this way without booking anything?"

"Yeah. I was worried about my stubborn partner, didn't even have the plane tickets until I got to the airport," he told her. "Anyway-"

"You can stay here." The words were out without her thinking about it, but she didn't regret them. She could see the confusion on Jay's face. Given their somewhat heated discussion, he probably thought the last thing she wanted was for him to stick around. The truth was she just didn't want to talk about it. Having him here, maybe it would help. "It's late, it'll take you a while to find anywhere, and you said you were gonna be back here in six hours anyway. So just stay here."

Hailey was prepared for him to decline or ask if she was sure, but instead he said okay and set his bag down on the side.

"There blankets in the cupboard?" he asked, already moving over to them.

"The bed's big enough, you don't need to sleep on the floor or anything," she said as he turned back to face her, the question clear on his face. "It's fine."

"Okay." He indicated to the bathroom. "I'll just get ready."

Hailey watched him disappear inside with his bag before closing her eyes. She wasn't sure what she was feeling anymore. There was so much going on but talking with Jay just then had been somewhat calming so she figured she stood a chance at getting some sleep.

Jay was in the bathroom for a couple of minutes before she heard the door open. She reopened her eyes then, watching him as he put his bag on the floor and moved over to the bed.

"You sleep like that?" she asked, noticing he was still in the same clothes.

For a second she thought he looked nervous but then he had a smile on his face. "Uh yeah, I normally just sleep in boxers and I didn't bring anything else so-"

"Jay," she said, matching his smile for a moment so he knew she really didn't have a problem with it. "Just do what you normally do, okay?"

He nodded before starting to lift his t-shirt as Hailey rolled onto her side and closed her eyes. If it had been any other time, she would have enjoyed teasing him about the situation, but for now she just wanted to pass out and forget about the world. Everything else could wait until the morning.


	5. Chapter 5

Hailey held the gun tightly in her left hand as she crept up to the garage door. The lights in the house had gone off almost an hour ago, the streetlights had followed twenty minutes later, so now her only source of light was the full moon shining brightly in the sky. She had considered turning on her torch initially to guide her path, but her eyes had adjusted enough that she could get by, and she didn't want to take any unnecessary risks. She had waited too long to fail.

Carefully she checked around the sides of the garage, making sure no one was lurking unexpectedly, before leaning back against the brick wall. It was empty, no one in sight. She paused for a few more seconds, holding her breath as she listened for anything out of the ordinary, but again there was nothing, just the sound of rustling leaves on the trees. It was exactly as she had planned it.

As silently as she could, she placed her hand on the door handle and turned it. She hadn't expected the door to be unlocked, she had brought tools to pick it, but she guessed Fuller had never imagined anyone would be stupid enough to break in. The thought stuck with her, causing a moment of hesitation, but she pushed it aside as she nudged the door open. It creaked a little at first, but Hailey knew no one was close enough to hear it.

She moved inside, carefully shutting the door behind her, before turning around. The car was sat in the middle, just waiting for her. She took a few steps towards it but froze as suddenly the lights came on.

Her eyes narrowed in response to the sudden stimulus as she felt the panic coursing through her body. This wasn't part of the plan. As her eyes finally adjusted, she found Fuller stood in front of her, a baseball bat in hand, and then he was laughing. Hailey didn't know why to start with but then two of his guys dragged someone into view and dropped them on the floor. She let go of the gun at that point, felt her legs begin to buckle. She recognised that shirt.

"Hey." His voice was strained as she took in the blood coating the back of his head. How had this happened? How-

"Hailey."

Suddenly she was running. The door seemed further away, but she reached it and threw it open before freezing in place. She was at Tanya's house now. She could hear the cartoons playing from the TV. OA was calling out her name, telling her to clear the living room. She didn't want to though; she knew what she would find in there.

"Hailey." It was Jay's voice again, but she couldn't place him.

All she could see was the TV because for some reason she was sat on the sofa next to Tanya's kids. They were bouncing around her and making jokes as she shook her head. Something was wrong. Yet she didn't have time to dwell on it because she heard the sound of the backdoor being kicked in. Instinctively she stood up and drew her gun, telling the kids to get behind her. She could save them.

She kept her eye on the door, ready to shoot whoever came through, but suddenly one of the kids ran out in front of her. She told him to get behind her, but he ignored her, playing with his sister. It was as if she didn't exist to them. She tried to grab him with her free hand, but he dodged out of the way. She tried again but then the door was thrown open to reveal Fuller, gun in hand. Hailey screamed out as she heard the first shot and dove in front of the kids.

"Hailey."

Her eyes flew open as she shot up. Her heart was racing, her breathing was rapid, and she felt like she was burning. What the hell was happening? But she didn't have time to work it out as she felt something on her shoulder. Instinctively she flinched before flinging her arm up to defend herself, but someone grabbed it.

"Hey. Hey, it's just me."

Jay? She swept her eyes around the room quickly. She was still in the hotel, still in bed. She turned to her left slightly to find Jay sat up next to her. One of his hands held the arm she had flung at him, the other was resting on her shoulder.

"It was just a bad dream. You're okay," he told her.

It took her a moment to process his words as she scanned the room again. It was just a dream. As the realisation settled in, she hunched over, bringing her legs up to her chest. Jay let go of her, allowing her to wrap her arms around her legs as she rested her head on her knees. It had all seemed so real, even when things hadn't made sense, and she had felt every single second of it. The garage, Jay, Tanya's kids.

She took a deep breath, reminding herself that it hadn't happened. It was just her mind playing tricks on her. She was okay. Jay was okay. The kids-

"Hailey." She felt his hand back on her shoulder. "Here."

After a few seconds, she lifted her head to find Jay holding a glass of water out to her. She hadn't even noticed that he'd gotten out of bed, let alone grabbed her a drink and come to sit on her side.

"Thanks," she said as she took hold of the glass and took a sip.

It was refreshing given that she felt as if she had just run a marathon.

"You okay?" he asked after a while.

"Yeah," she said, briefly looking to him before focusing back on the glass. "Yeah, I'm fine."

Jay clearly didn't buy it. Not that she blamed him, she didn't buy it herself, but she just needed a minute. Thankfully he didn't seem in any rush to get her to talk as he remained silent, watching her while she finished the water.

Hailey felt a little better by the time she put the glass on the side. Her heart rate and breathing were back to normal, and she no longer felt completely overheated. She was sure she had sweated through her top though given the way it was clinging to her.

"You want any more?" Jay asked, indicating to the glass.

"Nah. I'm just…I'll be back in a minute," she said, quickly getting out of bed and grabbing one of her tops from the side before heading into the bathroom.

She flicked on the light, squinting slightly as her eyes adjusted. Once they had, she moved over to the sink and turned on the tap. She splashed some of the cold water on the back of her neck and over her face before looking up at the mirror. She looked terrible.

The bags under her eyes stood out more than yesterday, her eyes were still bloodshot, and it looked like she was getting a spot near the top of her forehead. She held her reflection's gaze, having a silent conversation with herself. She couldn't carry on like this, it wasn't healthy. And how the hell had it even gotten to this stage?

With the question in mind, she broke her own staring match and pulled the slightly damp top over her head before replacing it with the clean one she had grabbed. It made her feel a little better, but really she needed a decent night's sleep without the nightmares to come close to looking anything like her usual self. Hoping that her mind was done for the night, she exited the bathroom and dumped her old top down on a pile of clothes before walking over to the bed.

Jay was back on his side already, but he was sitting up, watching her as she moved over and climbed in. She lay down on her back, looking up at the ceiling as her eyes began to readjust to the darkness. After a moment, she felt Jay moving next to her. He had been patient, not pushing her, but she knew she had to say something soon. She looked to her left briefly, seeing Jay in a similar position, before focusing on a spot on the ceiling. She wasn't sure how long it took her but eventually she opened her mouth.

"You ever wonder how you got here?"

Her eyes stayed focused on the spot as she waited for Jay to answer. For some reason the question she had asked herself in the bathroom wouldn't go away, all she could think about was what had led her here. She never usually had nightmares, not since she was a kid, except on a few rare occasions. There had been several after Garrett had disappeared, a few after Jay had been shot, and one after Cameron.

"Sometimes," he said. "You thinking about what got you here?"

"Yeah. The obvious thing would be Cameron, but I don't know." Hailey wasn't sure if it was the sleep deprivation, the nightmare, or the realisation of what Jay had done to be here so he could listen to her, but she found herself wanting to continue. "I think maybe he was just the catalyst. Maybe I was already heading in this direction before. I saw the way Voight handled things, I saw him make decisions I wouldn't have, and I saw it get results."

"It wasn't always a good result."

He was right; she could recall times when it hadn't ended well. Al was a prime example of that. "I know. But it worked more often than it failed, at least from what I saw. Guess it's like a greater good."

She heard Jay moving slightly, she had a feeling he wanted to see her reaction, but she couldn't look at him yet. It was easier to talk while she kept her focus on the ceiling. That way she didn't have to see the concern or the disappointment.

"You really think that's our choice?"

Hailey took her time with his question. Her instinct was to say yes because of what she had seen. They could do so much more this way; save more people, stop those who would get away with things on a technicality. It was why Voight had done all he had. She could see his motivation so clearly and it made sense. But then she forced herself to think back to the Hailey who had joined the Intelligence Unit. There was no way in hell she would have ever considered any of this. Everything had been much clearer then. Everything had seemed so simple.

"I don't know. I used to think no, but then you see what we see, and some cases make those rules become a little greyer."

Jay was silent for a while, she assumed he was trying to work out what to say in response. Not that she blamed him for taking his time. This was never going to be the easiest conversation, but at least they were having it. And she was being honest, just like he wanted.

"I know things aren't black and white. I know we all make exceptions, we all bend the rules at times to help someone out, but there are some we just can't," he said, causing Hailey to turn her head to the left and catch his eye. "We can't be judge, jury, and executioner. Voight went that route; you've seen what it cost him, what it's turned him into. I don't want you to end up like that."

"I won't," she said as she rolled onto her side so they were face to face.

There was still a decent sized gap between them, this invisible barrier that stopped them getting too close. Hailey considered reaching out in some way so he would know how serious she was, but for some reason she couldn't do it.

"Hailey-"

"Look, there are some things that Voight has done that I would never do. Certain lines that I will never cross. You know that."

"Right now, yeah. But honestly I think you're closer than you realise to reaching a point when you might decide it's worth it."

She shook her head and opened her mouth ready to defend herself, but Jay got there first.

"Two years ago would you have ever considered it possible to do some of the things you've done recently? Or would they have been lines you'd never cross too?"

The questions caused her to shut her mouth. Her original defence was useless because as much as she hated to admit it, he was right. She would never have considered planting evidence before she joined this unit. She would never have considered getting someone killed because of something she said until she had seen Voight do it. Yet now they both seemed like good decisions because two terrible people could no longer hurt anyone.

Jay was clearly waiting for an answer, but she couldn't give it to him yet, so they stayed staring into each other's eyes. Hailey wondered when the change had occurred but like she'd told him earlier, she couldn't pinpoint when she had decided these things were okay. Her best guess was that it had been happening for a while, but it had taken the situation with Darius and Cameron for her to act on it. And it had taken this conversation with Jay for her to realise how much she had changed.

"I get it," she said finally.

She needed more time to process it. It wasn't something she could just snap her fingers and fix, but it was something she really would think about. If she could figure it out and make peace with everything that had happened, maybe she would be able to get back to normal. Being able to let a case go, being able to go out and laugh with her friends, being able to sleep without having a nightmare, she needed that.

Hailey wasn't sure if she should say anything more, if Jay wanted to continue in some way but then she saw the small smile on his face and she knew he was content with her words. He would give her the time to think it through, though she had a feeling they might be having a similar conversation sometime in the near future.

"Look, you don't have to but if you want to talk about your nightmare, we can."

Part of her had hoped that they could avoid it, that they could pretend it had never happened after their previous discussion, but clearly he was still worried about her.

"It can help."

"You learn that from the shrink?"

"I did actually."

She felt herself smiling then. He really had stepped up when she'd called him out that time. He had taken it seriously, and she'd seen how much it had helped him, so after a while of internally debating what to do, Hailey built up the courage to say something.

"It was about the case." Jay didn't say a word, but he was watching her intently, so she continued. "I was doing the thing I want to do, but it went wrong. They were waiting for me and they had you somehow. They uh, they had beaten you and he…he was just laughing."

She could recall it as if it had really happened. Every detail was burned into her brain.

"And I ran. I don't know why, but I ran and then I was in the house from earlier today. The one where we found the bodies." She paused, the images of the kids coming to mind. "I tried to save them…but I couldn't."

She shook her head slightly. Whatever happened in this case, she would never be able to forget what she had seen.

"This guy. He's pure evil. He's gotten away with so much, too much, and every time we get close, something happens. He let a truck full of people suffocate and we found them. We were an hour too late. He tortured some guys he thought were snitching, he burnt two of them alive. And today. Today he murdered a mother and her two children to send a message. And I got her involved. She only helped us because I made her." Hailey had found herself acting oddly calm as she explained it all to Jay, but as she was confessing her part in Tanya's death, she could feel her voice wavering. "I knew there was a risk, but I didn't think it would go this far."

Hailey wasn't sure what she expected Jay to say, but the next thing she knew he was moving closer to her, moving through the invisible barrier they kept between them, and wrapping an arm around her. He was slow in his movements, Hailey knew he was giving her an out if she wanted it, but for once she didn't want to overthink the situation. So she let him pull her closer until she was properly in his arms, her head nestled in the crook of his neck, and her hand resting on the bare skin of his back.

"It's not on you," Jay told her when he finally spoke. "You were just doing your job. What happened to those people, that's on him. And if you ever find yourself questioning that again, you just ask me."

Hailey gave a nod and held onto him a little tighter in response. Aside from their hug at the airport, it had been such a long time since she had been held by anyone. There had been quick hugs from Vanessa and Kev, and the others here and there, but nothing like this. She had gotten used to being on her own again, to not needing anyone, yet something about this just felt right.

So she stayed silently in his arms, slowly pushing away all the painful thoughts and trying to focus on their current situation. Normally she tried not to dwell on the matter because she didn't want to risk losing what they had, but thinking about what could be was one of the few things she could look forward to right now.

"We should probably try and get some sleep," Jay said with a yawn which set her off too.

She muttered her agreement as she closed her eyes before realising there was one more thing she needed to say. "Thanks for being here."

"Anytime," he said, his hand gently caressing her back as she found herself succumbing to sleep.

* * *

Hailey shifted slightly, keeping her eyes firmly shut and holding on tightly to the pillow her arm was wrapped around. She knew it was morning, that it was almost certainly time to get up, but she really didn't want to. Part of her was surprised her alarm hadn't gone off yet, though maybe she had slept through it. Not that she ever had before but given her night it was certainly a possibility.

As she willed herself to open her eyes and check the time, she suddenly felt the hand on her back and the thumb tracing gentle patterns.

"Hey, you awake?"

His voice was barely a whisper, but she would recognise it anywhere. Memories of the morning and the night before came rushing back. Finding Jay in her room, their fight, her nightmare, their talk, and eventually falling asleep in his arms. It was then that she realised the pillow she thought she was holding onto was not a pillow but in fact Jay. She was still lying next to him, one arm wrapped tightly around his waist, her hand resting on top of the blanket.

"No," she finally said as she turned her head slightly, burying her face further into his shoulder.

Jay chuckled, running his hand through her hair a couple of times. She guessed it had ended up in his face. "Well you've got another five minutes until you really need to get up."

She groaned in response; what she wouldn't give to have the day off. Not having to think or deal with the case and staying right here in bed. It had been a while since she had shared a bed with anyone, and they were just friends, but something about it felt so natural. Even with the current position they were in there was no awkwardness, they were still just themselves.

"You could always call in sick," Jay said but Hailey shook her head, she couldn't do that to the team.

"Shower and coffee. Then I'll be good to go," she told him as she finally opened her eyes.

It was still dark in the room as she looked up at Jay. His face was illuminated by the phone held in his free hand, which explained what he'd been up to while she slept.

"How long have you been awake?"

"Half an hour or so," he said, placing his phone down on the side. "And just so you're aware it's almost six thirty. I turned off your alarm, figured you could use the extra sleep and I know how quickly you can get ready."

"Yeah, thanks," she said, bracing herself for what would come next. The extra sleep had certainly helped but she really needed to get a move on.

After a moment more of preparation, she pushed herself up slightly, reached across Jay and flicked on the light. Instinctively she narrowed her eyes as they adjusted, and again she heard Jay laughing.

"You look great by the way."

"Shut up," she said as she sat up properly.

She could just imagine what she looked like, but she didn't care really. Carefully she opened her eyes fully and looked to Jay. He was sporting an amused grin, not seeming as affected by the light. She locked eyes with him for a second, feeling a smile come to her face before shaking her head and averting her gaze. She was just about to get out of bed, but then she caught sight of the scar by his shoulder and found herself unable to move.

She had never seen what it looked like. The only time she had seen the wound was when he had been bleeding out. Seeing the mark now was this weird reminder of the day he had almost died.

"Hailey?"

"Uh yeah." She forced her eyes away. "I'm gonna get that shower."

Before he had a chance to say anything more, she climbed out of bed and headed over to the pile of her clean clothes. Jay had probably noticed what she was staring at, but she didn't want to make it weird. Besides, she wasn't sure she was ready for a conversation related to his shooting. Every time she thought about it, she remembered the pain of waiting for any news, of thinking he would die, and the revelation about her feelings for him. And that was another conversation she wasn't ready for right now. She was barely surviving and Jay was adding stability as her partner; she couldn't risk doing anything to jeopardise that.

Keeping her focus on the clothes in front of her, and off of Jay, Hailey grabbed her work outfit and headed into the bathroom. Given how long she had to get ready, she made sure to take a quick shower and tie her damp hair up.

When she walked back out, she found Jay, fully dressed, sat on the edge of the now made bed.

"We've still got time to grab a coffee on the way," he said as he stood up.

"Still doing the whole chaperoning thing then?"

"Oh yeah," he said, holding up the car keys for her to see. "So ready to go?"

"Yep," she said as she grabbed the keys out of his hand. "Since the FBI loaned the car to me, I've got to be the one driving it."

"That so?" he asked as she quickly put on her shoes and grabbed her coat before joining Jay at the door.

"You can still buy the coffee if you want," she told him as she headed out of the room.

Her remark didn't seem to deter him as he followed her into the hall. It was only after she had shut the door and started walking down the corridor that Hailey had found herself questioning how Jay had even gotten into her room yesterday and if he had the means to get back in while she was at work. He had pulled out his own keycard as soon as they were in the elevator and let her know that his badge seemed to work just as well here as it did in Chicago. She'd mentioned something about the abuse of power as they got into the car but Jay just smiled at her in response.

The drive to the office was fairly relaxed. Jay kept things on the lighter side, telling her about the team's trip to Molly's and Platt's attempts to get a karaoke night started. The story had Hailey laughing and smiling, a reminder of what normal could look like.

Even though the traffic hadn't been on their side, and she was operating on far too little sleep, Hailey felt strangely calm as they turned onto the street of the FBI office. Given the lack of time, Hailey dropped Jay off outside the building with the name of the coffee shop just down the street. It was the best one she had found so far and there was no way she was heading into work without one. Plus, it saved her having to sign Jay in as a visitor since he wouldn't actually be coming into the building.

Once Jay was out of the car, Hailey finished the drive and parked in one of the designated spots. She quickly gathered her bag and coat, locked the car, and headed to the entrance. By the time she made it outside the front of the building, she spotted Jay walking towards her, two cups in hand.

"You're a life saver," she said as she took hold of the cup and had her first sip before checking the time. "I should go."

"Yeah, just let me know when you're planning to leave."

"Still gonna do that?" she asked, gaining a smile and a nod from Jay. "Doesn't seem like a great use of your time, or money."

"Why don't you let me worry about that? You do your thing and then you can show me some of this New York food for dinner."

"As long as it's not the pizza," she said, causing Jay to let out a laugh. "What are you going to do with your day anyway?"

Jay shrugged. "I'll figure something out."

"Okay," she said before checking her watch again. "Yeah I really gotta go."

"I'll see you later," Jay told her with a smile before she turned around and headed inside.

She walked through the lobby and swiped her card to gain access to the rest of the building before running into OA. He caught her up with the newest developments, unfortunately there weren't many, before asking what had put her in such a good mood this morning. She had told him it was the coffee, which was partially true, but mostly it was the man who had brought her the coffee. The one who had dropped everything to fly out here and help her. The one who had seen her at her worst, who refused to give up on her, and had held her all night long. The one she was completely and utterly in love with.


	6. Chapter 6

As soon as the clock read five o'clock, Hailey grabbed her belongings and said a quick goodbye to the team. For once in the past ten days she was leaving on time. Normally she couldn't stop herself from following up on another lead or idea, yet today she had decided to make a change. She wasn't sure why but something about today just felt different. Maybe it was the fact that there hadn't been many new developments in the case, or at least none they could do anything about today. Maybe it was because she had gone through at least two more coffees than normal to try and cover up her current state, though she had still seen a few concerned glances from OA throughout the day. So maybe it was because she had something to look forward to this evening, something that would stop her from the continuous cycle she tended to fall into.

With the thoughts in mind, she stepped up her pace as she headed down to the lobby. As soon as she was out of the elevator and walking towards the security barriers, she spotted Jay sat on the chairs on the other side. He seemed distracted with whatever was on his phone so he didn't notice her until she was a couple of feet away.

"Hey, how was it?" he asked, a smile coming to his face as he stood up and pocketed his phone.

"It was okay."

She didn't want to get into the details here, not while someone she worked with could potentially overhear their conversation. Jay seemed to take the hint as he indicated to the entrance without probing any further.

"Did you decide on a place to eat? Don't know about you but I missed lunch and now I'm starving."

For once she had eaten, but it wasn't much so she could easily go for dinner now. She was curious as to why Jay had missed out but that could also wait until they were further away from the office.

"There's a decent Thai place a couple blocks from here. We can grab it to go and eat at the hotel," she told him as she led him in the direction of the restaurant.

"Sounds good."

They walked in silence from then on. Hailey knew she should make conversation, but the truth was she was exhausted. The caffeine boost from her last coffee was wearing off so she just wanted to get the food, drive back to the hotel, and then pass out for the evening. Thankfully Jay seemed to be willing to let her do it her way, though she didn't miss the slight concern on his face every time she caught him looking at her during their walk.

"So what's good here?" Jay asked once they were inside and queueing up to order, causing her to furrow her brow. She wasn't exactly an expert on the place. "You had three takeout containers from here in your room, figured you'd tried a few different things."

She nodded; her room didn't paint her in a great light at the moment, but she could clean up before she went to bed, let Jay see that it wasn't as bad as it looked. Besides, she knew that wasn't really what he wanted to talk about now, he was just trying to get her to engage with him.

"Everything I've tried has been great," she told him as she handed him a menu. "Just get whatever you want, my treat."

"Did I mention I hadn't eaten? You might regret the open offer," he said, causing a small smile to come to her face.

The truth was it was the least she could do after everything he had done for her already. "We both know I owe you. You flew out here, you-"

"Hailey, you don't owe me anything," he told her, looking slightly more serious than before. "I'm here because it's exactly where I want to be."

"You want to be in New York at a takeout?"

"I do," he said with a grin before nudging her in the direction of the person wanting to take their order. "Now don't judge me for this."

For all his bravado, Jay didn't order much at all. Sure it was more than a typical person had for a single meal, but not by much and she had certainly seen him eat more before. She didn't say anything though, instead she placed her own order before waiting quietly on one of the seats. Jay too seemed to be content with the silence as they waited.

After her second yawn, Hailey found herself closing her eyes for a moment. The food wouldn't be long, but the lights were too bright for her liking. She would open them again in a few seconds though and ask Jay what he had been up to with his day. She was still curious after all.

"Hailey." She heard her name at the same time as she felt a hand on her arm, gently shaking it. "Food's ready."

It was quicker than she expected but she wasn't going to complain. She rubbed at her eyes before opening them and realising what had happened. Her head was resting against Jay's shoulder and the guy that had served them was giving her a sympathetic look. She had fallen asleep.

"Come on," Jay said as he helped her up and grabbed the bag of food. "Let's get back to the hotel."

She gave a nod as they headed outside and back towards the FBI office, all the while trying not to yawn again. She needed to wake up for the drive back, something the cold air was certainly helping with.

"Want me to drive?" Jay asked once they were on the same street as the office, causing a smile to come to Hailey's face.

"Nice try, but for once I get to do all the driving," she told him, suddenly feeling a lot more with it.

"I was just trying to help. And I don't do all the driving."

She glanced at him, seeing the grin on his face as she did the maths. "Like ninety percent I would say."

"If you wanted to drive, all you had to do was ask."

They both knew that wasn't completely true, Jay really loved driving the truck. "It's fine. I like having you as my personal chauffeur."

"Funny."

"I know. Now wait here while I go grab the car."

She didn't give him a chance to respond as she walked into the building. Signing Jay in would take longer than her getting the car so it was just easier this way.

After a few minutes, she had picked up Jay and was driving in the direction of the hotel. Jay decided to catch her up on some more stories from Intelligence as she drove. She knew he was keeping a close eye on her given how tired she was, but they both knew she wouldn't do anything to put them in danger. Besides, some sort of adrenaline spike had hit her so she was feeling fine for now.

"I'm gonna get changed quickly before we eat," she told him once they walked into the room.

Yet after a few steps she found herself coming to a halt as her eyes processed the scene in front of her. It seemed Jay hadn't expected her sudden stop as he bumped into her before she turned around to look at him.

"Did you clean up?"

"Yeah," he said as he walked past her and over to the small table which now had one neatly stacked pile of papers instead of the scatted mess of paperwork and takeout containers from this morning. "It's not a big deal."

Hailey stayed where she was as she swept her eyes around the room. It was almost the same as when she had first arrived. For some reason part of her was annoyed that Jay had seen it like this and dealt with it. Yet when he looked back to her, after having placed their food on the table, she found the annoyance fading away. He wasn't judging, he just wanted to help.

"Thanks," she told him before grabbing her pyjamas and going into the bathroom to change.

She didn't want to risk spilling anything on her work clothes, and she wanted to be in something more comfortable for the rest of the evening. It didn't take her long to change and hang up her clothes, and by the time she had taken a seat opposite Jay, he had the containers out, ready for them to dig in.

They ate in a relaxed silence for a few minutes until Jay started the conversation she knew was coming. He wanted to know how her day had really been because okay was not going to cut it. She was honest with him, while avoiding any FBI specific details, because at this point there was no reason to hide what she was going through from him.

She explained that it had been a slower day, which had helped in some ways but also frustrated her because she didn't feel like they were any closer to getting Fuller. It also meant that she had spent more time dealing with the fallout of what had happened to Tanya, which was not easy. However, by the end of the day there was some hope. They had a few new things to follow up on tomorrow and maybe one of them would pan out.

Jay listened, only asking a question when it seemed like she was going to shut down, but she had promised herself she wouldn't. It was hard but she would do her best to be honest with Jay about everything. Because he was right, she couldn't continue the way she had been before.

"I'm thinking an early night," Jay said once they were done and he was throwing the empty containers into the bin while Hailey checked the time.

"It's seven thirty." And while she could probably pass out quite easily, she couldn't believe Jay was that tired. "Why don't we watch a movie?"

It didn't require much effort and watching something light-hearted before she went to sleep might stop the nightmares for once. Jay seemed a little sceptical but gave a nod before walking over to the bed.

"We're at least watching it from here," he said as he climbed on and grabbed the remote. "Because those chairs aren't great."

"Works for me," she said as she followed Jay and sat down on her side of the bed. "You can choose."

She rearranged the pillows slightly so she could sit upright comfortably as Jay picked a movie for them. Once he had chosen something, he flicked off the lights before turning to look at her.

"Sure you don't just want to go to sleep?"

"I'm sure," she told him with a yawn that had him trying to suppress his amusement. "Just start the movie."

* * *

When Hailey awoke, she stretched slightly before feeling the arm wrapped loosely around her waist. She opened her eyes and let out a yawn before focusing on the bedside clock. 05:00. That was unexpected. She knew she had passed out early, the last thing she remembered was telling Jay she was only resting her eyes when he insisted she lay down, and that was around eight, which meant she had just slept straight through nine hours with no nightmares.

A small smile came to her lips at the realisation. She wasn't a hundred percent sure what had caused it. It could have been the talk, or talks, her and Jay had had the other night, the fact that nothing major had cropped up on the case yesterday, the pure exhaustion she had been dealing with, or perhaps it was some combination of all of them. Regardless of what had caused it, Hailey felt better than she had in days and she knew it had a lot to do with the man whose arm was still wrapped around her waist.

Some of the thoughts she tended to keep locked away sprung free at that point, but for once she didn't dismiss them. Given everything else going on in her life, thinking about the what ifs allowed her some respite from the darker thoughts. Because what if Jay did feel the same way as she did? What if she could wake up like this every day? What if the person she relied on at work could become the person she relied on at home too?

As she pondered the thoughts, Hailey felt a slight chill on her arms and realised that the top of the blanket was pinned under the arm Jay had wrapped around her. She knew she could move him and pull the blanket up, but with all of her what if thinking she found herself being bolder. Carefully she turned over to face Jay before slipping her arm around him and feeling the warmth of his body.

"You okay?"

He pulled her closer, readjusting their position until he had both arms around her. She nodded against his chest in response, her hand gently running over his back.

"I'm good, Jay. Go back to sleep."

He always said he was a light sleeper, but she hadn't realised how light until now. Thankfully he seemed to accept her words with a muttered okay. She continued gently tracing patterns on his back as she closed her eyes, running her fingers down to the top of his boxers and then half way up his back as she heard his breathing even out, letting her know he had gone back to sleep. Hailey knew she was awake and had no chance of joining him, but she also had no intentions of getting up. Instead she stayed exactly where she was, just enjoying the current situation.

The feel of his arms around her, her face pressed against his chest, and their slightly intertwined legs. All of that, along with the feel of his bare skin under her hand, caused more of the what ifs to come to mind because no matter how she tried she couldn't explain this away as just friendly behaviour. She couldn't see him doing this with Kim or Vanessa, and she couldn't picture herself doing this with Kev or Adam, at least not since she'd called off their thing. So there was something there, she was sure of it, but were either of them ready to have that conversation? That she wasn't sure of.

Absentmindedly her hand continued its careful movements, while she carried on with her internal assessment, until her fingers moved over something different to the soft skin she had been expecting. She paused her hand on the lower left side of Jay's back as her finger traced the slightly raised skin. It was then she realised what it was; the scar from the first time he had been shot as her partner.

She could recall the day far too easily. Even though he had assured everyone he was fine, she had seen the signs, seen him starting to unravel, but she had let it play out for too long before doing anything about it. It was one of the things she regretted most, but she had given him the benefit of the doubt at the time because she got messy relationships. She understood that he thought he didn't care because she knew she would have done something similar if it had been her own father, which was why hindsight was such a wonderful gift. She should have forced him to stay at the station or she should have stayed with him, anything other than what had happened. At least it hadn't been serious though, not like his more recent shooting.

Hailey pulled back slightly then, opening her eyes and finding the mark on his shoulder easily. She had seen it yesterday but not for long and she didn't want to stare while Jay could see her. Given that he was asleep and she was much closer, she could get a better look at it. It was insane how such a small thing had almost cost him his life. Right now it seemed so harmless, such a small part of him, but she could remember every detail of finding him bleeding out and struggling to breathe as she tried desperately to get him to hold on until help arrived.

Without thinking about it, Hailey found herself moving her hand up his chest until it came to rest by the more recent scar. Just like before she couldn't help but trace the skin. Jay always said he was fine, that he had fully recovered from it, but she wondered if that was true or if it triggered the same memories when he looked at it.

"Having fun?"

Immediately Hailey stopped her movements and looked up to find Jay, with a sleepy grin on his face, staring back at her.

"Sorry," she said, flattening her hand and moving it under his scar. "I was just-"

"Being curious."

"Yeah," she said as he raised the arm he had wrapped around her and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Does it hurt?"

The mark still looked quite red, especially given how pale the rest of him was, and since he'd called her out, she couldn't help herself. Yet Jay shook his head as he replaced his arm back around her.

"Gets stiff sometimes but I've got stretches for that. Don't worry, next time I get shot I'll get them to aim for something less important."

She pushed against his chest, shaking her head. "Not funny."

Her expression certainly contradicted her words as he pulled her a little closer, trapping the hand she had used to shove him between their bodies so she couldn't repeat her previous action.

"Little bit funny," he said as Hailey tried desperately to keep her feelings under wraps.

It was just a lot harder given their position. They were so close, it would be so easy for her to lean up and kiss him, see what happened, but what if it was a mistake? She was only just starting to feel like herself again and Jay being here was a big part of that. If anything went wrong between them, if she had misread the signs, she wasn't sure she could deal with the fallout right now.

"You sleep okay?" Jay asked. "You seem much more awake this morning."

"Yeah, think that's the most I've slept in a long time. Sorry about passing out so early."

Jay shook his head, the smile still plastered on his face. "You needed it, plus watching you try to stay awake was way more entertaining than that film."

"Shut up," she muttered. "So how about you? You sleep well after your day of exploring New York?"

She hadn't managed to ask about it yesterday since he'd focused the conversation on her, but with her renewed energy she could tell Jay was no longer as worried.

"Yeah, I didn't do much exploring though. Will made me do all the sites when he was living out here."

"Will lived here?"

"Yeah, he was a plastic surgeon out here for a few years."

"Seriously?" For some reason she found it hard to picture the Will Halstead she knew being a plastic surgeon. He seemed to thrive in the ED environment when she saw him at the hospital. "How did I not know that?"

"Well you should definitely bring it up when you next see him, he loves talking about it."

She laughed a little, clearly Jay enjoyed teasing his brother about it. "So does this mean I should be getting you to pick out where we eat tonight since you know New York so well?"

Jay shook his head slightly. "I haven't been here in five years and I only visited Will a couple of times when he was living here so I wouldn't call myself an expert."

Hailey nodded, only just realising what that meant. She wasn't sure if Jay had picked up on it, but she couldn't ignore the timeline her brain had conjured up for her. Erin had moved here three years ago which meant that Jay hadn't once come out to see her. Admittedly she didn't know the ins and outs of everything that had happened between them, but she had seen enough of the aftermath, and she wouldn't have blamed him if he had come out here at some point to see her or try to reconnect after everything they'd been through together.

"Well you're more of an expert than me," she said, trying to keep things light. Jay hadn't mentioned Erin in a long time and she didn't want to be the one to bring it up. She'd only briefly thought about it herself when she'd first arrived at the office, wondering if they would run into each other. In the end, given that they'd only worked together for a short time and knowing her history with Jay, Hailey had decided to leave it to fate and not ask after her. If she spotted Erin, she would go and say hi. If not, nothing changed.

"True, maybe I should do a Will and force you on a tour of the city."

Given the grin on his face, Hailey knew that even if Jay hadn't realised what the timeline meant, which he probably had, he'd made peace with what had happened.

"You know, I prefer to get to know cities without the tourism so what did you do the last time you were here?"

Hailey wasn't sure what she had said but with the way Jay's face fell, she knew she had failed in keeping things light. Yet before she had a chance to backtrack, Jay spoke.

"It was work actually." She could tell by the tone of his voice that it was bad. "You ever hear about Greg Yates?"

"The serial killer?" She vaguely remembered it from the news, but she had never looked into any of the details. Though given Jay's current demeanour it seemed like this was more than just chasing after a serial killer type of bad. There was something more to it.

"Yeah, he uh." Jay paused for a moment as if trying to work out how to say it. "Couple of years before you came to Intelligence Erin helped this girl called Nadia out. She was in a bad place, but Erin helped her get clean, let her move in with her, and got her a job in Intelligence. She was smart and she wanted to become a cop. You would have liked her."

Hailey nodded, not wanting to interrupt even though she already knew where this was going. The name suddenly sounded more familiar, fragments of the news stories were coming back to her.

"We were all tracking Yates down. Nadia had just gone out to pick up a birthday cake for Erin and he kidnapped her. Right outside the station. We tried, we came to New York but…" he trailed off, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry," she said as she managed to free her trapped arm and pull him into a proper hug. "That must have been really hard. For all of you."

Jay didn't speak so they stayed silently holding onto each other. Hailey wasn't sure how long it was before Jay finally pulled back and met her eyes.

"I should grab a shower."

She nodded, letting go off him. He needed some time to himself after everything that had come up, she got that. With a sad smile, he untangled their bodies and headed to the bathroom after grabbing a clean set of clothes. While Hailey wanted to be there for him, she knew better than to push him right now. So she got herself dressed and made the bed before taking a seat on it. She still had a while before she had to be at the office so she would wait for him, be there for him, just like he had for her.

It took about twenty minutes for Jay to emerge from the bathroom fully dressed. He smiled upon seeing her, less sad but still not as happy as when he had first woken up.

"Do you want to grab breakfast?" Jay asked as Hailey tried to hide her surprise.

Part of her had expected him to ask for some time alone, but she was more than happy to get breakfast with him. It would give them both time to talk about other things and hopefully start the rest of the day on a better note.

"Sounds good," she said as he tossed the car keys at her. "Thought you meant here?"

"Yeah, but we may as well head straight out after. Think I might grab us another coffee from that place by your office."

"Still escorting me to work then?"

"Oh yeah."

* * *

Hailey pulled on her coat and grabbed her bag. She waved goodbye to a few people before heading towards the elevator. Her day had been busier than the previous one but in a good way. It had started with her and Jay's breakfast where she had apologised for bringing up the Nadia and Yates situation. Jay had told her not to worry about it, that she couldn't have known, and it was just another reason New York didn't hold great memories for him. The topic of Erin had come up at that point, Hailey had offered to ask around if he wanted, but Jay assured her that it was in the past and that's where he wanted to leave it. He had come to New York for her, not Erin, not anyone else.

After he said that, and since he really did seem okay with everything, Hailey had dropped the topic and focused on more positive things, such as the Blackhawks latest game. It provided them with some harmless conversation before she headed into work, but not before a stop at the coffee shop at Jay's behest. It had been nice though, they were joking around, teasing each other for various things so by the time she was walking into work, she had a large smile on her face.

Her day at work had not been too dissimilar to her morning with Jay. There had been a few laughs with OA at the beginning of the day, something they hadn't managed much over the past week. Then there had been more follow up on Tanya's death, which had been hard but she had gotten through it. And then there had been the hope when OA found a way to get to Hector Salazar, one of Fuller's main guys. Things had snowballed after that but in a good way. In a way that meant this could all be over tomorrow if things went well and she could be the one to make it happen.

With that in mind, Hailey felt weirdly relaxed as she stepped out of the elevator. She spotted Jay sat on the chairs at the far end of the lobby, phone in hand. It took a few seconds before he looked up and spotted her. He smiled instantly and stood up, slipping his phone into his pocket. Hailey found herself sporting a similar expression as she headed over to him, yet before she was even halfway to the security barriers, she heard OA calling out her name.

"Hey, Upton. Wait a second would you?"

Jay seemed to read her silent message. He stopped walking to meet her as Hailey turned back to find OA only a few steps away.

"What's up?" she asked.

"I just heard about the undercover, you sure you want to do this?"

She nodded. The concern was genuine, and she understood it, the operation was not exactly the safest given the way Fuller conducted himself.

"Look I know you can handle yourself, you proved that your first day, but given what we've seen on this case…you don't have to do this."

"I'm good," she told him. "And given the FBI's resources, I'm expecting you guys to pull out all the stops."

"We will."

"Then it will be fine," she told him with a smile.

"Okay." He seemed like he wanted to say something more on the matter, but in the end he just mirrored her expression. "You know you've been far more cheerful since you started hanging with your mystery friend."

"What are you talking about?"

"The guy you've grabbed coffee with the last two mornings, same one you met here after work yesterday," he explained before indicating behind her. "And the one stood over there pretending not to be watching you."

"Have a good night."

She didn't give him a chance to say anything more as she turned around and walked away. She didn't care if he was watching her or wanted to know more. It was her personal life and she had no obligation to share.

"I don't know about you, but I'm starving," she said as she came to a halt next to Jay.

"Well lucky for you, I got some recommendations from Will about decent places to get pizza around here." She shook her head; she had already warned him about the pizza she had been recommended. "What? Come on, it can't be that bad and it's only a couple blocks from here."

"On your head be it," she told him as they headed towards the exit.

"I mean it is Will's suggestion so really it will be his fault."

"Nice try, Halstead."

* * *

"Okay, you were right about the pizza," Jay said as he lifted another slice to inspect. "When we get back we're going to Bartoli's."

"Deal."

She had tried to warn him, but after his 'how bad could it be?' she'd decided to let him find out for himself. Not that it was going to stop her eating hers, she was still hungry. As they continued making small talk, Hailey noticed the way Jay was looking at her, the way he clearly wanted to say something.

"What's up?"

"The undercover," he said. She had suspected it might be that. Jay had looked uneasy when she'd told him about it while she drove them back to the hotel. She knew she wasn't supposed to tell him, but after all the rules she'd broken recently, this one didn't seem like such a big deal. Plus, it was Jay. He would never do anything to jeopardise the operation. "You sure you're good for it?"

"You sound like OA."

"Well he sounds like a smart guy," Jay said as she took another bite of her pizza. "I'm just saying given how close you are to this, there's no harm taking more of a back seat."

She nodded. She got where he was coming from, she was sure she had said similar words to him in the past, but over the last few days she had felt her attitude changing. They were going to get Fuller one way or the other, but she was going to do this the right way, the way Jay would do it. So if this undercover had a chance to nail him, she had to be a part of it. This was for the people she had found in the truck, for Tanya, for Tanya's kids.

"Look, I know I wasn't in the best place when you got here and I'm still dealing with it all, but I can handle this." She really was working at it, every time she had the urge to do something not quite right, she heard Jay's words and she took a moment to collect herself. That's how she knew this was the right move. "If I can help take him down with this, I have to do it."

Jay took a moment, holding her gaze, before finally giving a nod. "Okay."

Hailey smiled at him. Two days ago he wouldn't have gone for this, but the fact that he had just said okay meant that he could see it too. She was making progress in the right direction and this undercover would help. If he thought she was still going in the wrong direction, he would have forced her to talk about it, but it seemed as though he was starting to trust her judgement again.

"So as fun as it is talking about my day all the time, how was yours?"

"Nowhere near as exciting," Jay told her before filling her in on what he'd been up to.

The hotel's gym had taken up most of his morning after he left her. He'd explored the local area a bit, finding somewhere to eat, before Will called him. Apparently Adam and Kev had informed Will of Jay's sudden disappearance while interviewing a suspect at the hospital. Jay explained that he'd eventually managed to talk Will out of his panicked state without going into too many details of what he was really up to. He'd gone with the same story he had told Voight. He was okay but he needed the time for something personal which couldn't wait and which he couldn't give details on.

Hailey really appreciated that he wasn't telling the others the real reason; she hated the idea of them knowing what had happened to her. Being vulnerable around people was not something she was used to. It had taken her long enough to get used to Jay seeing that side of her, and for now that was more than enough.

"So another early night?" Jay asked as he closed the empty pizza box.

Part of her was tempted. Curling up in bed with Jay was something she had found herself looking forward to, but she couldn't do that just yet. There was something else she needed to do first. Something she had been thinking about earlier today which had to be done tonight.

"I need to do something first, sort out some loose ends before tomorrow," she explained. It was time to remove the options she had originally given herself, "and I need you not to ask about it."

The grin Jay had previously been wearing vanished immediately. She gave him a moment to register her words before getting up and moving over to the cupboard. She pulled out the duffel bag she had stashed away a few days ago before turning around to find that Jay had followed her. He didn't know exactly what was in the bag, she had managed to stop him looking the night he turned up, but he had enough of an idea, which meant he likely knew what she was up to.

"I could help," Jay said but Hailey shook her head. This was something she had to do alone.


	7. Chapter 7

"You know for a fed you sure dress up well," Hector said as he pulled up at a set of lights and looked over to her.

Hailey ignored his remark and the way his eyes moved over her. Dress up was something of an overstatement given her attire, especially as it wasn't even ten am yet.

"So when this is all over-"

Yet he didn't get to finish as Hailey's phone started ringing. She gratefully pulled it out of the bag she had been loaned to see 'Jonny' on the screen.

"Hey," she answered as she looked around, checking their location.

"Upton, where the hell are you guys?" OA asked. "Fuller's been here for ten minutes already."

"Yeah, we're still a couple of minutes out. Apparently he would be suspicious if we turned up on time," she said, repeating verbatim what Hector had told her when she'd asked the same question.

"And this way he'll be in more of a hurry to do the deal, so he won't be as worried about you being there," Hector chipped in.

"You get that?" she asked. The sooner she could be done with this guy the better.

"Yeah. How's it going with him? You good?"

They both had their reservations about working with Hector but he was someone high enough in Fuller's organisation to get a face to face, and unless he helped them he was looking at life in prison, so it really was the best option.

"Yeah, as expected. I should go, we're almost there."

Without giving OA a chance to respond, she hung up and put the phone back in her bag. Given what Fuller was like, there was no way she could wear an earpiece or carry a gun, but she did have a camera in the necklace she was wearing so the FBI would be able to see and hear everything. And in case they got split up, Hector also had one masquerading as a button on his shirt.

"Okay, so remember we were late because of our fun filled morning," Hector said with a look that repulsed Hailey. "And I've paid for another two hours so we need to get this thing done quickly."

"Got it," she told Hector.

The man had a thing for escorts, everyone in the organisation seemed to know about it, so him turning up with one with the promise of free coke as payment had a chance of fooling Fuller. And if it didn't, the FBI was only thirty seconds out. It didn't seem like a long time, but Hailey knew a lot could happen in thirty seconds. If he pulled a gun or a knife, it would be too long, but she could do it. She just had to stay ahead of Fuller and she would be okay.

As Hector drove them past the entrance gate and towards the worn down warehouse, Hailey pushed away all the negative thoughts. She had to stay in character, it was the best chance they had. She couldn't think about all the bodies, about Tanya or how last night she had thrown away her guaranteed way to nail him. She had to embrace the naive woman who had come here to score coke as payment for services.

"Stay here," Hector told her once he'd parked the car.

"That wasn't the deal."

She was supposed to go with him, try and get Fuller to incriminate himself in the murders if possible.

"Just trust me, I'm on your side," he told her before stepping out of the car.

Hailey watched him walk away and through the door to the warehouse as she debated her options. Trusting him was not sitting well with her. Sure he had a camera on him and the others could hear what was happening, but she had no idea. Maybe she should follow him or maybe Fuller was more likely to say something if she wasn't there.

Before she had a chance to make up her mind, she heard a knock at the window causing her to jump. She had been so focused on watching Hector that she hadn't noticed the man, now stood outside her door, approach the car. Part of her cursed herself for not paying more attention, the other was sure this would play into her character which would likely help the situation.

She rolled down the window, plastering on a fake smile. She recognised him well enough, he was one of Fuller's personal security. "Hey."

The man looked her over before letting out a sigh. "Could you follow me?"

"Um well Hector said I should wait here for him. He said he'd only be a few minutes."

"It might be a little longer. You'll be more comfortable inside," the guy said, opening the door for her.

It was clearly not something he would let her say no to, but she couldn't let him see what she was really thinking, so she channelled her new persona.

"Aren't you sweet," she said, holding out her hand and making him take it to help her out of the car. "Are you one of Hector's friends?"

"This way."

It didn't seem like he would talk to her, but that didn't stop Hailey from asking him innocent questions and sharing some anecdotes about her job as they walked. By the time they were at the door to an office, she hadn't gotten anything useful, though on the plus side the man didn't seem to think she was anything more than an annoyance, which was helpful. If things went south it was always better to be underestimated.

The man knocked on the door, waiting for a 'come in', before opening it and guiding her inside. She quickly scanned the room. There was an old wooden desk in the middle, two empty seats nearest to her, and sat on the opposite side was Fuller.

"Hector brought a friend again."

Hailey felt her smile falter for a second as she realised how close she was to the man she had dubbed as pure evil, but she forced the fake enthusiasm back on her face by the time he looked to her.

Fuller shook his head slightly and dismissed his guard before offering her a seat. "So what's your name?"

"Candy." She kept up the bright smile as she took in more of the room, spotting cabinets and some artwork on the wall. "Nice painting."

"My wife did it."

"Really?" Hailey was impressed but she exaggerated it. Candy was not a subtle person. "Wish I was as talented at something like that, but we're all blessed with different gifts. At least that's what my mom said."

"So you're a friend of Hector's?"

"Yeah, well for another two hours I am," she laughed, but Fuller didn't share in her amusement. It worried her slightly, but he was likely just being careful.

"And you came here because?"

"Because he said he had to take care of some business. He said it would only take a few minutes but if I came with him he could get me some of the best coke in exchange for an extra hour of my time," she explained, keeping up her flirty persona and ignoring the repulsive thoughts in her head. "So do you work for him?"

Hailey saw a flash of annoyance cross Fuller's face out of the corner of her eye as she continued to look around the room, pretending not to be interested in him even though she was really studying his every reaction. He was a proud man so an insult like that was likely to trigger something in him, which is exactly what she wanted. She needed him to drop his guard and what better way than to be insulted by a nobody.

"Actually, I'm Hector's boss."

"Oh," Hailey said as she turned back to face him properly, a more genuine smile on her face since he'd just admitted to his role in the organisation. It wouldn't be enough for a lot of the charges, but she was just getting started. "Well good for you."

"So where are you from, Candy?"

They had a whole backstory worked out which Hailey had spent the early hours rehearsing. Hailey was about to launch into an over detailed version to annoy him, but then her phone started going. There were a lot of contacts in the phone in case anyone went through it, but only the FBI had the real number, and there was only one reason they would be calling.

Hailey kept the uneasiness hidden away as she flashed Fuller an apologetic look before reaching into her bag and grabbing the phone. As expected, the name 'Jonny' was lighting up the screen, yet before she had a chance to answer it Fuller snatched the phone out of her hand.

"Hey!" she protested, ready to grab it back but then she saw the gun in Fuller's hand.

"Who's Jonny?" Fuller asked as he took a seat on the desk, the gun still trained on her.

Hailey could feel the adrenaline spiking in her body, getting her ready for a fight if needed but she was very much at a disadvantage right now. "He's my boss."

Fuller gave a nod before powering the phone off and setting it on the desk. "I'm sure he'll call back. Now I think you and I should take a walk."

"Look I don't know what the hell you and Hector are doing, but I don't intend to stick around here for this shit. I-"

"Sweetheart, do you really think you have a say in what happens right now?" Fuller asked as he stood up and indicated for her to do the same.

He was right. She didn't have a choice so she stood up, letting some of the fear show because while Candy had a tough front, she was not ready for this situation. Hailey on the other hand had considered this possibility so as Fuller told her to open the door and start walking, she kept her eyes peeled for options. She had no weapons on her and while she could likely disarm one person, one of the guards or Fuller himself could easily shoot her in the meantime. So she would have to wait. OA had tried to call her so clearly something was happening with Hector, but he also would have seen what had happened to her.

Realistically the FBI were likely closing in now. This operation was getting too dangerous, but Hailey knew they didn't have enough to get Fuller on the murders. It was risky but she decided to start talking to Fuller again, asking him what was going on in the way only someone who didn't fully comprehend how bad of a situation they were in could. Fuller didn't answer her so she continued to talk until they came to a set of doors at the end of a corridor.

"You see, Candy, your friend Hector is not a good guy," Fuller said as a guard opened the door for them. "In fact, he's really screwed up lately."

Hailey walked through without having to be told before seeing Hector kneeling on the floor in the centre of the room. His hands were tied behind his back and he had clearly already endured a few blows given the blood streaming down his face. That didn't seem to bother the man who landed a punch against Hector's jaw though, causing Hailey to grimace.

"Over there," Fuller told her, indicating to Hector, but Hailey didn't move.

This wasn't a chat and walk away kind of situation, he was going to kill both of them. She needed to buy time. So instead of moving over, she turned back to face him.

"Look I don't know what you're all doing but I just want to go. I won't say anything, I-"

"That can't happen. You see we're careful here and we can't just take someone's word. We tried that once before but it didn't end well."

Hailey shook her head, still refusing to move. "No, I don't believe you're like that. You have a good heart, I can tell."

Fuller laughed as Hailey swallowed the bile that had risen in her throat. She was running on pure instinct right now.

"Oh, Candy. You know I quite like you but stop this and get over there before we make you."

"No," Hailey said, seeing the guards starting to move in her direction. "I'm not involved in any of this. Fine Hector screwed up but that's not my fault so why would you do anything to me? You're a good man, you have a wife, you couldn't do something like this. There's just no way, you've not got it in you."

"You watch the news, Candy?" She nodded as he moved slightly closer to her. "You see that story about a mother and her two kids who were murdered earlier this week."

Tanya. He had to be talking about Tanya, so again she nodded, not wanting to stop him.

"I killed them, with this gun actually, so you really think I can't kill a stupid piece of trash like you?" Hailey felt her muscles tense as a weird sense of relief flooded her body. He had confessed and it was recorded. Whatever else happened here, he would be going down for life. "Now move because I don't have time for this."

She didn't though. She stayed exactly where she was, just staring at him and going through her options. It wouldn't be long now. The FBI had to be close, but she wasn't sure how much time she had left until he did something stupid. So maybe she should disarm him. He was close enough that she could grab the gun, but was it worth the risk?

"Did you hear me?"

Hailey didn't have a chance to answer as suddenly she heard the familiar sounds. Yells of FBI echoed all around along with gun shots and screams. She dropped down instinctively to avoid the firefight as Fuller did the same. She wasn't sure if he had made her but after the first wave of shooting, he jumped up and bolted towards the exit. There was no way she was letting him get away though, so she pushed herself off the ground, kicked off the heels she had been wearing, and ran after him.

He had a head start on her, but she was in better shape. Before Fuller reached the door, she launched herself at him and tackled him to the ground. She landed on top of him and went to grab his arm but he spun around and smashed the butt of the gun into her face before she had a chance to stop him. Hailey fell back onto the floor, slightly dazed from the blow, but instinctively raised her arms to defend herself from the next one.

She felt his arm connect with hers as her vision cleared and she saw him climbing on top of her.

"You stupid bitch!"

Hailey took her chance to land a blow to his ribs causing him to scream out in pain as she pushed his gun hand away.

"Drop it, Fuller! Drop it right now or I will shoot you!" OA yelled as Hailey kept up her defensive position just in case he decided not to comply.

He took a moment, clearly contemplating his options before dropping the gun. OA told him to push it away and then lie down with his fingers laced behind his head.

"You good?" OA asked once Fuller had complied with his orders. Hailey gave a nod as she pushed herself off the ground, doing her best to ignore the stinging sensation from her cheek. "Want to do the honours?"

She turned back to see OA holding out a pair of cuffs to her. She gave him a small smile before taking them and moving behind Fuller.

"James Fuller, you're under arrest."

* * *

"So what will it be?" OA asked when they finally made it to the bar. "Beer or you want something stronger?

It had been a hell of a day and while she was somewhat tempted to go for something stronger, she had a feeling she would be staying for a few drinks. It was her last day working with them after all.

"Beer's good," Hailey said as she took a quick look around and spotted most of the team already sitting at a table in the corner.

After all the interviews had been conducted and the case files updated, OA had hung back with her while she returned everything the FBI had loaned her. It had taken longer than she had expected with all the paperwork she had to sign but it meant she didn't have to return in the morning. It was something she had a feeling she would be very grateful for when she woke up tomorrow. Of course there was still more to do on the case, but Hailey had done her part and her two weeks were officially up.

"So what's next for you then?" OA asked as they waited at the bar for their drinks. "Back to Chicago? The cold, the weird pizza-"

"Okay, you can stop right there," she told him with a laugh. "And yeah, flight's booked for tomorrow afternoon."

She had managed to call Jay once she knew she was definitely finishing up today to let him know and ask him to book their flights back. Part of her had considered asking if he wanted to stay for a few days and explore the city with her, but then she realised that she needed a change of scenery. Even with the result they had gotten, New York would likely always be a reminder of those she had failed, and she needed to get away from it.

"Well thanks for being a good partner," OA said after he grabbed one of the beers and raised it in her direction.

Hailey grabbed the other bottle and tapped it against his. "Yeah, working with you wasn't as bad as I thought it would be."

"High praise as always," OA said with a laugh as Hailey took a sip of her drink.

"Thanks for having my back though, especially today," she told him.

She was aware of how close she had come to not walking away from the situation. Fuller was a cold blooded murderer; the fact that she was sitting here with only a few bruises from her encounter with him was because OA had gotten there in time. And that was something she would never forget.

"You saved me your first day, I saved you today. I'd say we're even," OA told her before focusing on something over her shoulder. "I think someone's looking for you."

Hailey furrowed her brow before turning around to see Jay stood by the entrance. They locked eyes immediately, a smile coming to both of their faces. Given everything Jay had done for her, he deserved to be part of the celebration, which is why she had texted him earlier and asked him to come along.

"Hey," he said as he came to a halt in front of her, clearly only noticing the bruise on her face now that he was up close. "You okay?"

"I'm good." Hailey considered reaching out to grab his hand or give him a hug, but with everyone else around she decided to keep it more professional. "You want a drink?"

"Yeah." She had a feeling the grin on her face was enough to let Jay know she really was okay as she saw his concern fading. "I'll get the same as you."

Hailey gave a nod and turned to the bar, ready to order, but then she heard OA speak.

"I'll get it. I'm OA by the way."

Quickly she pivoted back around to find OA stood on her left and Jay on her right, and OA's arm stretched out in front of her.

"Jay," Jay said as Hailey watched them shake hands.

"Oh, so this is Jay," OA said, glancing at her and seeming far too amused for her liking. "Nice to finally meet you. Heard a lot of good things."

"You too," Jay said as Hailey looked between the two of them.

It had seemed like such a good idea to invite Jay at the time, but now she realised she would have to explain who he was and what he was doing here.


	8. Chapter 8

"So what happened?" Jay indicated to her face once OA had turned back to the bar.

"He ran," she said, taking a swig of her beer before seeing the raised eyebrow from Jay. "I tackled him, and then he hit me with his gun while he was trying to get away."

There was still a slight stinging sensation from her cheek, but the alcohol would numb it soon enough. She took another sip as Jay continued to watch her, clearly after more details. She got it though; the adrenaline rush of doing their job was like nothing else, and while the stories weren't the same, they were close enough when you were waiting around in a hotel for your partner.

"I take it you fought back," Jay said, indicating to the hand she had wrapped around the beer bottle.

She gave a nod. Her knuckles were still slightly raw from the blow she had managed to get on Fuller, but Jay didn't seem concerned with that. If anything, he looked proud.

"OA did kinda save me though," she said, gesturing to the man behind her.

"Pretty sure she could have handled it," OA said as he handed Jay a beer over her head. "Probably better for our suspect that I got there when I did though."

"That seems likely," Jay said, shooting her a quick look before focusing back on OA. "Thanks by the way."

"Not a problem. So how are you finding New York?" OA asked as he moved round so he was stood next to both of them. "You against the pizza as much as your partner?"

Hailey shook her head slightly as she leant back against the bar while Jay let out a short laugh.

"Yeah, hundred percent with her on that one."

OA sighed, looking between the two of them. "You two make no sense. We have good pizza."

"You ever tried Chicago deep dish?" Jay asked, causing OA to shake his head. "Yeah, try that first before you tell us how wrong we are."

"Okay. So aside from slandering the good New York food, how have you found the city? You two been up to anything fun? Hailey doesn't do small talk so all I know about her evenings is that they were fine."

Jay laughed a little as Hailey moved her eyes to OA so he could see exactly how she felt about his comments. It didn't seem to deter him though as he flashed her a smile before focusing back on Jay. She didn't do small talk at the best of times because there was no point, but she had been extra cautious recently given what she had spent a lot of her evenings doing. It wasn't like she could have told OA about the evening when she'd purchased a crappy old car, or the one when she had taken the gun to plant on Fuller, or the evenings she had sat outside his house planning to plant said gun. Nor could she tell him about the other night when she had ditched the car and returned the gun because she realised it wasn't the right way to do things.

"It's been a good getaway," Jay said as Hailey found her eyes landing on him. "I needed a break, figured why not come out here and see it a bit more. My brother actually used to live here for a while. He was a plastic surgeon if you can believe it."

"Really?" OA asked as Hailey shot Jay a thankful look. He had once again deflected the attention away from her. "Cop and a plastic surgeon, that must be interesting at family get togethers."

"He's changed to working in the ED now," Jay said, completely ignoring the family get together mention. It was only him and Will now after all. "So how long you been working here? Like the FBI life?"

OA nodded before explaining some of his background to Jay. It seemed he either didn't notice the avoidance of his previous questions or he had decided to let it go. Either way Hailey was grateful, she didn't want to think about the previous few weeks if she could help it. She just wanted to focus on the future and put this case behind her.

For the next few minutes, Hailey kept quiet, just listening to their conversation about OA's past, but then she spotted a familiar face at the entrance to the bar. Isobel was stood with a few people Hailey didn't recognise. She watched as the ones she didn't know headed over to the rest of the team while Isobel walked over to them.

"I see you've started without me," Isobel said as she came to a halt next to OA and Jay.

"Yeah, you want something to drink?" OA asked.

"A beer would be great," Isobel said before looking to Jay. "I don't believe we've met. I'm Isobel."

"Jay," Jay said as he shook her hand.

"Jay is Hailey's partner from Chicago," OA filled her in. "He's been hanging out here for a few days."

Hailey wasn't sure the last part was necessary, but apparently OA seemed to be enjoying himself.

"Nice to meet you," Isobel said before looking to Hailey. "Could I borrow you for a few minutes?"

"Uh, sure."

"Don't worry, I'll keep Jay company," OA said as Hailey found her eyes darting between the two of them.

She considered saying something but decided against it as she followed Isobel. They would be fine without her, she was sure they would have a lot to talk about considering their similar backgrounds. That was assuming they got to that part and OA didn't spend the time dropping hints about her and Jay's relationship since he clearly believed something more was going on. Which yes, he wasn't a million miles off with his assumption, but there was only one person she wanted to discuss such things with, and that person was Jay.

"So," Isobel said once she had led Hailey outside and away from everyone else. "How are you doing?"

"I'm good," Hailey told her. It was the acceptable answer, the expected one even, but not the truth. The truth would cause a world of problems though, problems that Hailey was working through and knew better than to share with others. Yet after seeing the slight doubt on Isobel's face, she knew she couldn't brush everything off. She had to show she was still human. "I mean I'm tired like everyone else, and I still wish we could have gotten him earlier, but we did get him."

Isobel gave a nod, holding her gaze. They hadn't interacted too much over the past few weeks, but Hailey was sure she was currently being analysed. She wasn't sure how well Voight knew Isobel, if she was feeding back to him or if this was something else, but she wasn't enjoying the situation.

"It was a good result. A lot of people have been talking about it," Isobel told her. It generally happened with high profile cases, but Hailey kept quiet, waiting to see what else Isobel had to say. "You know, when we asked for a loan out officer I wasn't sure what we would get, but it's safe to say you surpassed expectations. And not just mine."

"I was just doing my job."

"And you did it well. The whole team had nothing but praise for how you handled yourself."

Hailey felt the slight tug at her lips. It was nice to hear, and it would make going back that much easier if this was the feedback Voight received. "That's kind of you to say."

"I'm not saying it to be kind, Hailey. I'm saying it because it's the truth and we like the way you work," Isobel told her. "It's also why I'd like to offer you a job."

* * *

By the time Hailey made it back inside, OA and Jay had moved over to join the rest of the team and a second round of beers were being ordered. Jay's eyes found hers as soon as she and Isobel reached the group. They had a silent conversation, both letting the other know that they were fine, before tuning back into the discussions around them. Everyone appeared to be in good spirits and Jay seemed happy enough chatting with OA and a couple of others, so Hailey allowed herself to be pulled into a conversation with Isobel and another group.

It was nice getting to talk to everyone without the looming weight of the case hanging over them. The mood in the office over the past week had been rather low so seeing the carefree side of everyone, even those she thought were more strait-laced, was a good end to her time with them. They had all worked so hard, they deserved the celebration and Hailey had every intention of helping that happen.

For the next few hours stories were shared, drinks flowed, and laughter rang out amongst the group. Hailey found herself sharing some light-hearted tales from Intelligence which had everyone laughing. Isobel commented on what a good fit she was a couple of times and made a few other subtle remarks about the benefits of working for the FBI, which Hailey decided to ignore. She knew what Isobel was trying to do, but Hailey wasn't interested in discussing it any further than they already had. She just wanted to forget about work for the rest of the evening and enjoy getting to know the others better.

"Think it's my round, who wants a drink?" Jay asked as he got up from his seat.

His eyes moved around the group quickly before settling on her. They hadn't managed to spend much time together with everyone else around wanting to talk, but helping Jay grab a round of drinks seemed like the perfect excuse. Yet before Hailey got a chance to volunteer herself, OA offered to help.

"Same again, Upton?" OA asked, causing her to nod.

A moment later Jay and OA headed off to the bar together as Hailey found herself being pulled into another conversation. She couldn't focus on what was being said though, so soon found herself looking over to the two men who seemed to be laughing at something. Part of her wanted to go over and join them because even though she knew she would have Jay to herself as soon as they left, she just wanted to hang out with him.

"I think we need a round of shots," Hailey announced once there was a lull in the current discussion. A few faces were pulled in response but she didn't let that deter her as she stood up. "What? It's a celebration."

There were a few protests and a few calls of encouragement as Hailey moved towards the bar. It was a lot busier than when they had first arrived. Instead of the empty bar there were now several rows of people circling it. Most seemed to have been served but were standing nearby as there was no more seating available, which meant Hailey had to weave her way through to get to Jay and OA. Yet before she made it to them, she heard OA say something that made her stop where she was.

"So what is the deal with you and Hailey then?"

Both of them had their backs to her, leaning on the bar, and there were still a few people between her and them, but she could hear their voices well enough.

"We're partners," Jay said before giving his order to the bartender.

"Yeah, you two say that a lot," OA said. Jay seemed to be focused on the bar, not interested in engaging the topic any further. OA on the other hand glanced around before spotting her. Hailey saw the smile emerge on his face as he turned back to Jay. "So you're cool if I ask her out?"

Hailey felt her mouth drop open slightly as Jay snapped his head round to face OA. She couldn't see his expression properly, but the laid-back stance he'd had before suddenly seemed tense.

"Uh, Hailey doesn't date cops."

"Right. Maybe the FBI would be different to the cop rule though," OA said, keeping his focus on Jay as Hailey continued to watch them.

OA had a girlfriend and he knew she was there, so clearly he was just trying to get Jay to react. And she got it, she got what OA was trying to achieve but she wasn't sure she was comfortable with it. Yet before she managed to step in and put an end to it, a drunk couple moved past her, pushing her further away from the two men she had been focused on.

"I don't know," Jay said, turning back to the bar as Hailey tried to get past the drunk couple.

A second later, OA patted Jay on the shoulder. "Don't worry, man. I was just playing."

There was a nod from Jay as the beers were lined up in front of him. Hailey slipped through the gap in the crowd and started moving towards them as OA leaned in closer to Jay. He said something she couldn't quite make out, but it seemed to ease some of the tension between them if the smiles they were both wearing by the time she reached them were anything to go by.

"Couldn't wait for your drink?" OA asked as Hailey squeezed herself into the gap between them, trying to get the bartenders attention.

"I'm actually getting us a round of shots."

"Oh this will be good. I'll take these over, Jay can give you a hand," OA said as he picked up the tray of beers and headed off before either of them had a chance to say anything.

Once he was gone, Hailey spun around to come face to face with Jay, a genuine smile forming on her lips.

"Hey," she said, noticing the way Jay mirrored her expression.

"So, shots huh?"

"It's good for morale," she said, gaining a laugh from Jay. "You enjoying yourself?"

She hadn't meant to leave him with the team, but Isobel had pulled her into some conversations which were hard to get out off and Jay seemed to be getting on well enough with OA.

"Yeah, nice to see this side of you back." She quirked an eyebrow at him." I haven't seen shots Hailey in a while so this can only end well."

"Shut up, I'm not that bad," she told him before suddenly finding herself being knocked into him.

She put her hands out to brace herself before glancing over her shoulder to see the drunk couple from before. They apologised quickly after seeing the unimpressed look she was sporting, causing her to shake her head slightly before turning back to Jay.

"You alright?" Jay asked as Hailey realised he was holding onto her arms and she had her hands pressed against his chest.

"Yeah. Yeah, thanks."

It took longer than it should have for them to remove their hands from each other and put some space back between their bodies, but Hailey doubted anyone else would have noticed. Given the crowd around the bar, her and Jay were barely visible to the rest of the group, which was likely why she had let her hands linger. It was either that or the liquid courage was starting to kick in.

"So," Jay started, tilting his head to the selection of spirits behind the bar. "What shots are you forcing on everyone?"

"Tequila."

She kept her eyes fixed on him as he told her of his approval. It was one of the few spirits they could both drink without having a terrible hangover the next day, and that was something Hailey had every intention of avoiding. The last thing she wanted to do was endure a flight hungover, which was why she asked for a glass of water along with the round of shots when the bartender took her order.

"Struggling to keep up?" Jay teased her as she bit her tongue.

She was just being sensible, normally if she was drinking this much she ate something.

"I'm going to remind you of this conversation tomorrow morning when I'm hangover free," she told him as she picked up her glass of water and downed half of it before setting it back on the bar.

"Okay," Jay said before reaching over and stealing the glass. He drained the rest of the water causing her to shake her head. "What?"

She considered calling him out on it, but then she realised what she really wanted. She wanted to be alone with him while they were both in a good place, and if there was ever a time, it was now. Who knew what tomorrow held for them or what would happen when they got back to Chicago?

"You want to get some food?"

Jay seemed surprised at her question. He probably assumed she wanted to stay out with the team all night long.

"Uh, yeah."

"Okay." As much as she had enjoyed the past few hours, she was looking forward to the next ones more. "So shots and the beer, and then we get out of here."

Jay agreed to her plan as the bartender finished filling the shot glasses. Once they were all accounted for, Hailey paid before seeing Jay lift the tray. She stepped in front of him, carving out a path for them to get back to the team. There were still a few concerned faces, but eventually everyone was convinced to join in, though a lot complained about the choice of tequila. Hailey didn't care though; she just grabbed a glass and held it in the air, causing the others to do the same, before giving a quick thanks to them all.

Once the spontaneous toast and the expected complaints about the taste were over, Hailey grabbed her beer and took a seat next to Jay as OA started talking to them again. Thankfully he didn't bother dropping any more hints about her and Jay. Instead he spent the time telling them about his partner and how he was sure her and Hailey would have gotten on. Hailey considered teasing him about his partner a little, but he was clearly still in denial about whatever their situation was, so she left it.

After another half an hour of talking to OA, Hailey placed her empty bottle down on the table and looked over to Jay. He was ready to go so Hailey announced their leaving to the group and started the rounds of saying goodbye to everyone before ending up in front of OA.

"It was good working with you," she said as she stuck her hand out, causing OA to shake his head and open his arms.

Hailey got the message and leaned in to hug him. "Good working with you too. And you know where we are if you ever need some FBI assistance."

"Yeah," she said as she stepped back. "And you know where we are when you want some decent pizza."

That got a laugh out of OA before he chanced a glance over her shoulder to where she knew Jay was waiting. She could tell he wanted to say something, and she couldn't help but raise her eyebrow at him, challenging him to do so.

"Would you even listen to my advice if I was to give it?"

She shrugged, unable to hide the grin on her face. "Say hi to Maggie for me when she gets back."

OA clearly hadn't expected her to mention Maggie, but he quickly hid his shock. "Maybe you and Jay can come back and meet her one day."

"Maybe," she said before turning around and heading over to Jay.

After a final wave goodbye to the team, Hailey walked out of the bar with Jay. As soon as they were outside, she felt the cold air hit her, followed by a wave of exhaustion. It was weird, a minute ago she had felt full of energy, like she could go on all night, but now she just wanted to head back to the hotel and crash.

"So where to?" Jay asked as he turned back to face her.

"We could just grab some take out." It wasn't what she had initially envisaged when she'd asked him if he wanted to get some food, but it would still just be the two of them, and really that was what she cared about.

"Hailey, it's our last night here and you just closed a major case," Jay said. "I refuse to eat take out again. We're going out to eat something decent."

"You refuse?"

"Yeah, so what will it be?"

"I don't mind," she said causing Jay to pull out his phone.

After a few seconds he looked back at her. "One of the places Will recommended is like ten blocks away, we can just go there."

"Okay, I'll get us a cab," she said before noticing the disbelief on Jay's face. "What?"

"It's ten blocks." She knew it wasn't far, and normally she wouldn't suggest it, but her adrenaline was fading fast and the cab would just be easier. Yet before she had a chance to say another word, Jay took a step towards her and grabbed her hand before pulling her in his direction. "Come on."

"Fine," she muttered as she fell into step beside him. "But I'm not walking after this."

* * *

Hailey took a few steps into the hotel room before coming to a halt. It really was over now. Ever since the arrests had been made she had been moving from one thing to the next on autopilot without processing what it meant. Even the team drinks at the bar and dinner had been filled with distractions. Her and Jay had spent their whole meal joking around and chatting about nothing important. So now, as she took in the hotel room, the place that had served as her temporary home for the past few weeks, it was finally hitting her. This was her last night here.

"You alright?"

She heard Jay's voice as he walked past her and chucked his coat on the back of one of the chairs. Hailey watched him for a moment. She wasn't disappointed to be leaving New York, she wanted to go home, to be in her own house again and see her friends, but there was one thing she would miss from all of this.

"You still with me or are all those drinks you insisted on having finally catching up?" Jay asked.

Hailey shook her head slightly, a smile playing on her lips. They still had one more night until they returned to reality.

"I'm good, and if I remember correctly it was you who ordered the bottle of wine."

"Because it's cheaper that way," he told her as she slipped her coat off and hung it up. "Besides, you were the one who insisted everyone do shots at the bar."

"That was team building," she told him as she turned back to see him holding up a bottle of whiskey. "What's that?"

"This is a celebration of a job well done. You know everyone kept telling me how great you were." There was a hint of nervousness on his face, but he quickly masked it. "So what do you say?"

"I say you're trying to get me drunk."

"Uh, should we revisit the shots situation?"

Hailey shook her head as she walked over to the side and grabbed the two glasses that had come with the room. She set them down on the table, her arm brushing against Jay's as she misjudged the space available. "Guess one can't hurt."

It was a lie. She knew she was drunk; her perception of space was slightly off, her body didn't move in the exact way she wanted, and the normal self-control she exhibited when it came to the man stood next to her was wavering, especially after their night. Normally she reigned herself in because the voice in her head pointed out that Jay might not be ready or even want what she wanted, but then there had been some rather strong signs this evening.

Jay had been the one to take her hand as they walked to the restaurant. Admittedly she had held on too, though neither one of them had mentioned it or let go until they reached their destination. Then during dinner Jay had fed her food off his plate because he wanted to prove that he had picked something better than her, which annoyingly he had, but she'd refused to acknowledge it. And when they had been waiting for a cab and she'd shivered, he'd wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close to keep her warm.

No matter how she spun it, Hailey couldn't justify their interactions as only friendly behaviour anymore. Because yes, they had both been drinking, which might have encouraged some of their bolder behaviour, but there had to be some underlying desires to motivate it. So maybe this was the perfect time for her to do something? If things didn't work out for some reason, she could blame it on being drunk and then avoid him for a while. Not that she wanted to avoid him. She had gotten used to him being around all the time, and for someone who was normally happy being alone, she really enjoyed spending her time with him.

Luckily Jay didn't seem to notice her staring as she ran through her reasoning. He just poured their drinks before handing her a glass containing a rather generous measure. Hailey kept her eyes focused on the brown liquid, contemplating her options, until she noticed Jay had turned to face her and was holding his glass up.

"To doing the right thing," he said, causing Hailey to turn towards him and meet his eyes. "And being completely awesome."

Hailey let out a short laugh as she lifted her glass and tapped it against his. They both took a sip before she raised her glass again. No matter what happened next, she needed him to know how much she appreciated everything he had done for her. She wouldn't be here without him.

"And to the best partner," she said. "Who's loyal, cares way too much sometimes, and never gives up."

The smile on Jay's face doubled in size at her words as he tapped his glass against hers. They didn't drink straight away though, both content with holding the other's gaze for a few seconds instead. Hailey opened her mouth slightly, ready to tell him the truth, before suddenly deciding against it and taking a sip of her drink. They were drunk and people did stupid things when they were drunk, things they might regret in the morning.

Jay followed her lead before setting his glass down on the table. Hailey considered doing the same, she really didn't need anything more to drink, but holding the glass provided her with some sort of barrier to her current desires.

"So," Jay started after a while. "OA mentioned something about the FBI giving you a job offer earlier."

He suddenly seemed slightly nervous again, because even in her current state Hailey could read him.

"Did he?" She hadn't brought it up because as far as she was concerned there was nothing to talk about, but it explained some of Jay's behaviour. "You two seemed to get on awfully well."

"Yeah, he's a good guy. So what's the deal with this job offer?"

"They offered. I said no." She drank from her glass before realising what a terrible idea it was. Apparently she had some reflex to keep going if it was in her hand, so she set the glass down on the table before noticing the relief on Jay's face.

"You didn't even ask to think about it?"

"I know what I want, no point stringing anything else out." Isobel had been disappointed and asked her to take some time to think it over, but Hailey knew the FBI wasn't for her. Not now at least. "Chicago is my home. My job, the job that I love, is there. There's good food and my house. And I mean all my friends are there, and you're there. Oh, and there's all the snow and the wind. I'd be crazy to give all of that up."

She hadn't meant to go on for so long, but as soon as she'd started all of her mental reasoning had come tumbling out. She doubted any of it was a surprise to Jay, she had a feeling it was the same reasoning he would give, but now he wasn't saying anything. Instead he was just watching her, a smile on his lips. Hailey started playing the words back in her head, wondering if she had said something particularly amusing, before realising what it was. She had listed him separately to her friends.

This was dangerous territory for them. She was so close to doing something stupid, something she couldn't take back. With all the willpower she could muster, she broke their silent staring match and started walking towards the bathroom to take a quick break and work out what the hell she was supposed to do. Yet after only a few steps she paused and turned back to find Jay watching her. What did she have to lose?

"Do you remember when I picked you up at the hospital and I said there was something I wanted to tell you?" she asked, trying to ignore the nervousness coursing through her body.

"Yeah," Jay said, the same hopeful look on his face as he took a step towards her. "Been waiting ever since for you to tell me what it was."

He moved another step closer as she processed his words. She had thought about telling him a few times since then, but life had gotten complicated.

"It never really seemed like the right time," she confessed, though that didn't seem to deter Jay.

He was still wearing the same hopeful expression as he opened his mouth. "And what about now?"

"Honestly, I don't know."

That was the truth of the matter. It could end up being a terrible mistake given everything she was still dealing with, but in her slightly inebriated state she had brought the topic up. She couldn't backtrack now, it wasn't fair to Jay, and at this point she didn't want to. So she moved to close the gap between them slowly, just as he had when he'd gone to hug her the first night they'd shared a bed. It gave him time to back away before she made a fool of herself if he wanted, yet he didn't move a muscle.

Hailey had the words in her head, finally ready to go, but in the end, once she was in his personal space, she found herself acting on instinct instead of logic. She kept her eyes on his as she leaned up, searching for any signs that she should stop, but she found none. Without giving herself the time to overthink it, she closed the remaining gap between them and kissed him.

It was only for a few seconds before she pulled back slightly and reopened her eyes to find Jay staring right back at her. It was another out if he needed it, yet he still didn't move away. Instead, a moment later, Hailey felt one of his hands on her waist as the other cupped her cheek. And then he was leaning back in until his lips found hers again.


	9. Chapter 9

Hailey stretched slightly and let out a muffled groan against the pillow her face was buried in. The nausea and throbbing sensation from her head were only getting worse as the rest of her body woke up.

"Morning."

Even with the pounding her skull was taking, Hailey found herself smiling at the sound of Jay's voice. There had certainly been one benefit to the amount she had drunk last night, even if it had resulted in her current state. After rubbing at her eyes and letting out a yawn, she turned over expecting to find Jay lying next to her, except he wasn't there. He was stood by at the foot of the bed, holding two cups of coffee and sporting an amused grin.

"What time is it?"

It was clearly light outside and even with the hangover Hailey felt weirdly refreshed which meant she must have slept in for once.

"Almost eleven." She shot up at his words but instantly regretted the movement and let out a curse as she rested her head in her hands. Jay's contribution was to laugh at her before she heard his voice again. "What happened to the person who was going to be hangover free and-"

"Shut up," she mumbled, again getting a laugh out of him. She didn't have the energy or mental capacity to come up with anything more useful or witty right now.

"Here."

A few moments later, once she dared to look at him, he handed her a coffee and indicated to the side table where a glass of water, some painkillers, and a note had been left. Her original smile was back as she reached over and grabbed the painkillers. She must have been in a deep sleep because she hadn't heard him at all this morning, but seeing what he had done for her made her realise how much he cared.

"Thanks," she said after washing down the pills with her coffee.

This would work. Just a few minutes and she would start to feel the effects and then she could function like a normal person again.

"How you feeling about food?" Jay asked.

She hadn't considered it until now, though she already knew the answer given the way her stomach lurched at the word.

"Maybe a bit later," she said, taking another sip of her coffee before placing it on the side table and laying back down in bed.

Not moving while the drugs did their work was the best plan she had right now. Thankfully Jay still seemed amused at her current state rather than horrified at what she had become if the look on his face was anything to go by.

"How are you not suffering right now?" she asked as she placed an arm over her head to block out the light.

"Oh, you know, I can just handle my drink better," he told her, gaining a glare in return. "I'm about an hour ahead of you, you'll be fine soon."

"Yeah, I'm just gonna stay here for a while."

Their flight wasn't until the afternoon, so they had a few hours until they had to be at the airport and Hailey knew it wouldn't take her long to pack and get ready, an hour max. Until then, she had no intention of moving from the bed. She had expected Jay to make a joke at her expense, but then she realised he was just watching her whilst drinking his coffee.

"You going to join me or just stare at me?"

"Kinda enjoying the view from here," he said as Hailey realised the blanket had fallen to just above her waist when she had shot up earlier, which meant her chest was currently exposed to him. Not that he hadn't seen it all last night, but that had been different.

"Okay," she said as she grabbed the blanket and pulled it back up.

"Didn't take you for shy."

"I'm cold. "

"Uh huh," Jay said as he set his coffee down on the table and took a seat on the bed next to her.

"Oh, this bed has a no clothes policy so you can't sit there like that," she told him, doing her best to keep a straight face as they held each other's gaze. The drugs were definitely kicking in and taking the edge off, so she had no reason to let him get away with what he had just done. "What? I didn't take you for shy either."

Jay chewed his bottom lip slightly before standing back up and taking off his shirt. Hailey couldn't help but grin at him as he unbuckled his belt and pulled off his jeans and socks. He shook his head slightly when he saw the look on her face before removing his boxers.

"Happy now?" he asked as he tried to climb into bed, but Hailey held up a hand to stop him. "What?"

She didn't speak straight away, instead she let her eyes roam over his body, taking in everything she had missed last night.

"Hailey?"

"Oh yeah, we're even now." She flashed him a smile before lifting the blanket and inviting him to join her.

"That was mean," Jay said as he climbed in and lay down beside her so that they were face to face.

For some reason Hailey felt a hint of nervousness as he shuffled closer, wrapped an arm around her and pulled her body against his. His skin was cool compared to the warmth of the blanket so she shivered slightly before looking up at him. He smiled down at her before leaning in to kiss her.

The kiss was slow, though there was no hesitation from either of them. It was as if they were both savouring the moment given how fast things had moved the night before. After a few seconds, Hailey felt Jay's hand moving up her back, gently brushing her skin, before tangling in her hair. In turn she placed her hands against him, one on his chest, the other at the top of his hip.

There was a short break, but after seeing the matching smile on each other's face, they both leaned back in. Neither of them showed the same intenseness as they had last night, but it didn't seem like either of them had any intentions of stopping either. Hailey soon found herself gently gripping at his body, using the hand she had placed on his hip to pull him closer until they were firmly pressed against each other.

"How's the hangover?" Jay asked after a while.

His voice was a little breathless and Hailey could feel the increased heart rate from the hand she had resting against his chest.

"Fading."

There was still a dull throbbing, but it was subsiding, and the distraction was certainly helping. Without saying another word, she moved the hand on his chest up to cup the back of his head and bring his lips back to hers. She was sure he would get the message from that, but to ensure he did, she slipped the hand resting on his hip lower, gaining her desired reaction.

* * *

Hailey lay on her stomach, her head still resting on Jay's arm, as she felt his fingertips gliding along her back. She kept her eyes on his face, studying his expression, as she considered breaking the silence that had fallen between them. It wasn't uncomfortable, but now that she had gotten her breath back she felt like she should say something. Given how much had changed between them over the past twelve hours, they probably needed to talk about what it all meant. Because yes, it was fun, but it couldn't just be fun, not with everything they had been through together.

"You're staring."

"A little," she admitted as his eyes met hers.

"Should I be worried?" he asked.

The jokey tone meant he wasn't really concerned so Hailey played along. "Why would you be worried?"

"Because as well as I know you, sometimes I have no idea what you're thinking."

She chuckled, partly from his words and partly from the feeling of his hand as it brushed against the hair at the back of her neck. "Good, that's the way I like it."

Jay shook his head slightly and leant back against the pillow, though the smile was still clear on his face. Hailey stayed where she was and watched him. Even though it had been meant as playful banter there was a truth to his words, because as much as she let him in, there were still parts of her that she kept guarded, just like there were parts he kept locked away too. It wasn't an excuse; she knew they both had to make the effort in that area if they stood any chance of becoming what she wanted, of what she hoped Jay wanted too, and she knew she had to start.

Slowly Hailey propped herself up and swung a leg over Jay. He raised an eyebrow at her as she moved the rest of her body over and sat on top of him. She just had to tell him; she probably should have done it last night before jumping into bed with him, but she would blame the whiskey and the wine for that, along with the shots and beer.

"So I still haven't actually told you what I wanted to say at the hospital."

The cocky grin on Jay's face disappeared immediately, replaced by a much more serious expression. A second later his arms wrapped around her waist as he sat up. Hailey noticed the uneasy look which he quickly masked as he focused on her, just as he had done last night. Maybe he knew what was coming, maybe he didn't, but it was better to get everything out in the open so they were on the same page. To reassure him, and herself, she flashed him a smile as she rested her hands on his arms.

"I uh." She paused for a moment, casting her eyes down and running a hand through her hair before looking back up. "You know I ended up sitting in that chair at the hospital for more hours than I can remember. And all I could do during that time was think about you and all these scenarios, like what I should have said to you when I last saw you and what would happen next. I think I went through every possible outcome and there was only one I couldn't handle. Every other one, no matter what happened, it didn't make a difference to me as long as you were alive. And it made me realise how much I cared about you, and not just as a friend, it was more than that. I realised that it didn't matter if things were good or bad, just as long as you were there."

She paused again; he was still watching her intently.

"I guess this is the long way of me saying that I…I love you, Jay." She offered him a small smile, giving him a few moments to process the words. When he didn't respond, she found herself continuing. "It's okay if you don't feel the sa-"

Yet she didn't get a chance to finish as Jay leaned in and kissed her. It was short but it felt different than the more frantic ones they had shared earlier, like it had a deeper purpose. And when Hailey opened her eyes, Jay was staring at her with a look she hadn't seen before.

"I love you too."

She knew she was beaming after he said the words, but she couldn't stop herself from questioning it. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," he said as he leaned in and kissed her again. "Didn't want to screw up anything between us though."

"Me neither."

They had both been in work relationships before, and they both put their all into the job, so it really could be a recipe for disaster. But then after everything they had been through together, with how they worked together and supported each other, it could be a recipe for success. The truth was that there was only one way they would know for certain and even though it could blow up in their faces, Hailey was willing to risk it all for just one shot at making it work.

"So what do we do now?" she asked, noticing the admiration on Jay's face as he held her gaze.

"Ah, well now," he said as he pulled her closer until her chest met his. "Now we commemorate the occasion."

"Oh really?" she laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck as she leant in, stopping just before her lips met his. "How do you think we should do that?"

Hailey felt one of his hands moving up her back as the other held firm on her waist. "Thinking something like this."

Without giving her a chance to say another word, he kissed her. Just as with their last one it was different to the others. It was slow and deliberate, as if they had all the time in the world. Yet as the piercing sound of her alarm cut through the room, Hailey realised they didn't.

She pulled back immediately and reached out to grab the phone. After her second attempt she managed to shut it up and drop it down on the bed next to them before turning back to Jay. "We gotta get ready for the flight."

"We do," he agreed, yet a moment later he had his arms securely around her as he spun them over so she was lying back on the bed and he was hovering over her. He leant down, placing his lips to hers for a second before pulling back. "To be continued."

"Definitely," she told him. Jay gave a nod and started to move away, but Hailey grabbed him before he got too far and pulled him in for one more kiss. "Okay, now we really have to get ready."

* * *

"Hailey." She felt a hand on her arm, gently shaking it, as Jay continued, his voice barely audible over the sound of the plane. "Hey, we're about to land."

She let out a groan before opening her eyes slightly and checking her watch, only ten minutes until they were supposed to touch down. The last thing she remembered was telling Jay that she was only resting her eyes for a few minutes when she leant her head against his shoulder shortly after take-off. However, it seemed as though she had managed to sleep through the entire flight. She rubbed her free hand over her face as she let out a yawn before feeling Jay's hand gently brushing against her neck. The sensation caused her to jerk away but not before seeing the amused look on his face.

"What?" he asked as he did it again causing Hailey to pull further away, but it wasn't like she could go far since she had the window seat and Jay had his arm wrapped around her.

"You know what," she told him as she batted his hand away, gaining a laugh from him.

"I'm just getting to know you better, what you like, what you dislike."

"Uh huh," she muttered as she removed his arm from around her and took the troublesome hand in her own before noticing the book resting on his knee. "Been busy?"

"Well since my in-flight entertainment decided to fall asleep, I had to find an alternative," Jay said as he put the book in his bag. "Thankfully, I was prepared."

Hailey was about to defend herself but the announcement of their descent from the captain cut her off. As she waited for it to be over, she found her focus moving to the window next to her and the outside world. There was a fair bit of cloud cover but enough breaks in it that she could make out some of the city below. Her city. Her home. It felt like a lifetime ago that she had left but in reality it had only been two and a half weeks.

"Happy to be home?" Jay asked, leaning in closer to look out of the window with her.

She nodded her response. She was happy to be back, she was happy to be done with New York especially after that case, but she was slightly worried too. Things were so different from when she had left and she didn't know what would happen now with any of it. She hadn't heard anything from Voight yet so she assumed everything was okay and that she would just go back to work, but he had been so mad before she left that maybe he had other plans for her, like another special assignment. And then there were her friends. They would all want to know how the assignment was, whereas she never wanted to talk about it or relive it again.

"Hey," Jay's voice caught her attention as the runway came into view, causing her to look back to him. This was the biggest change of them all. When she had left, they had been friends. Good friends sure, but friends nevertheless. Now, however, they had both admitted their feelings, and not just the I think I like you kind, it was the I love you kind. "You good?"

The plane landed with a small bump but Hailey kept her eyes on Jay the whole time. They could do this, they could make it work, make it different to what they had been through before. "Yeah. You?"

"I'm good," he told her before leaning in and kissing her. "Even better now that I get to do this whenever I want."

She laughed as she nudged him away, aware that they were in quite a public setting. "You're terrible."

"You like it though."

She just flashed him a smile before turning back to look out of the window as the plane navigated the airport. It wasn't long before they arrived at the gate and were allowed to disembark. As soon as they were off the plane and walking along the corridor, Hailey took Jay's hand in hers. It had been a long time since she had initiated holding someone's hand in public, but with Jay she enjoyed it and since there was no one around who knew them, she didn't have to be on her guard. They hadn't had a chance to discuss that part yet, but she knew she didn't want to tell anyone else for now, not while it was still so new to them.

They walked along the corridors hand in hand, comfortable in their silence to each other, until they got to passport control. It didn't take long until they were both through and heading towards baggage claim. It also seemed as if luck was on their side as the carousel was already moving by the time they arrived, so they quickly walked over to a gap in the crowd of people.

"Here," Jay said once he'd grabbed her bag, set it down on the floor, and pulled the handle up.

"What a gentleman," she said as she grabbed hold of the handle and started walking.

"You know me," he said, slinging his bag over his shoulder and falling into step beside her.

She did, just like he knew her. It was hard to admit, but they likely knew each other better than anyone else. The bond that had formed between them was something Hailey had never experienced with someone else before. There had certainly been something with Garrett, but this was different. It was what made her so sure that whatever happened they could work through it.

"So, think I could tempt you over to mine later?" Jay asked as they followed the crowds towards the exit.

"Want me to sneak out while Vanessa's watching TV?"

"Yeah. I can be your getaway driver. You know, wait down the end of the block with the lights off."

Hailey couldn't help but laugh, shaking her head slightly. She wanted to, but she also knew she should spend some time with her housemate after the past few weeks. Vanessa always said she was fine when Hailey broached the subject of Reyes in their texts, but Hailey knew what it looked like when someone was putting up a front, and she hadn't spoken to her much over the past week given everything else going on in her life.

"I think I need to spend some time with Vanessa tonight, but I expect I'm off for the next few days if you think you can take a few more off too?"

"Can't imagine one more would hurt. Probably best that we don't show back up on the same day though, unless you want the office gossip to start."

She hadn't even thought about that properly yet. With everything they had spoken about, not once had they discussed work or what to do about telling the others or more importantly Voight. Hailey already knew this was different to Adam, but she didn't want to say anything too early or have people sticking their noses in.

Acting on instinct, she grabbed Jay's hand and pulled him towards her before they reached the customs exit.

"What's up?" he asked as she walked them out of the way of the crowd.

"I know we haven't talked about everything properly yet, but this, us, this is what I want. You were there for me last week, you're always there for me, and I really don't know what I would have done had you not turned up. And you're right to be careful about showing back up at work together. I know we'll have to deal with that at some point, and I've still got things to work through, but I want to do it all with you."

There was a small smile on Jay's face by the time she finished speaking and a moment later he was leaning in to kiss her.

"Well that's good, because I want to do it all with you too," he said before taking a step back and indicating to the door. "Starting with some food before you abandon me for Rojas."

"I'm not abandoning you," she said as she walked towards the exit, Jay following alongside her.

"I mean you have an amazing night with a guy, tell him you love him, and then just up and leave him at the first chance for your roommate."

She shook her head as he tried to pull off being hurt, but the cocky grin gave him away.

"Think you'll get over it if I buy you breakfast tomorrow?"

"It's a start." She quirked an eyebrow at him, asking what else he was after, causing him to lean in close, his voice not much more than a whisper. "And, uh, you could continue what you started back at the hotel, when you took advantage of me in the shower."

"Took advantage?" She didn't remember him complaining at the time, though they had almost missed the flight because of it. "We'll see."

They walked through the custom's exit, both wearing stupid grins on their faces until Hailey heard someone call her name. She recognised the voice but it didn't make sense because she hadn't told anyone which flight she was on. And even if she had why would he be here? Yet before she had a chance to think it through, he was stood in front of her.

"Hailey," Voight greeted her before looking to Jay. "Halstead."


	10. Chapter 10

If Hailey had to describe the situation she found herself in, she was sure it was most relatable to being in a standoff. All three participants stood, watching the others, assessing the situation, and waiting for someone to make the first move. For her part, Hailey kept her eyes on Voight as he looked between her and Jay, but she still couldn't read him. Had he expected Jay to be here or was his presence a surprise?

"Car's this way."

Voight turned immediately and started walking through the sea of people. He didn't pose it as a question, asking if they wanted or needed a lift. No, Hailey recognised the tone well enough. It was an order and they were expected to follow it.

Part of her wished she had driven herself to the airport or that Jay had driven his truck so at least one of them had an excuse to get out of whatever this was, but neither of them had had the foresight to do so. After a check on Jay, and seeing that he was as lost as she was about what was happening and what to do, she started walking after Voight. It appeared they had no choice but to let this play out.

There was a lot of noise around them as they walked through the airport, the sounds of families being reunited and businesspeople catching up on their calls, but not once did she or Jay utter a word. They shared a few looks, but neither of them were sure how to play this. Jay had disappeared without telling Voight any details and Hailey hadn't spoken to him since the day she left, so surely he couldn't have known they were together. But then he had worked out when her flight landed so maybe he was keeping tabs on her, or maybe he was keeping tabs on Jay, or maybe it was both of them.

Once they made it to the car, Voight opened the trunk and indicated for them to put their bags in. Again it was all done in silence, as was her and Jay's decision on where to sit. They couldn't both sit in the back, one of them needed to be up front with Voight, so Hailey took the lead. Regardless of if he had expected Jay to be here or not, it was her he had come to collect.

"So," Voight started after a few minutes into the awkward journey. "I take it you'll be back in tomorrow."

Hailey had been so focused on staring out of the window that it took her a moment to work out who he was talking to, but then she spotted Voight looking at the rear-view mirror.

"Yeah," Jay said as Hailey tried her best to hide her disappointment.

So much for their time off together, though she realised that wasn't important right now. What was important was making sure Voight didn't punish Jay because of her. She had already decided that she'd take whatever he threw at her, but she wasn't going to let Jay get pulled into this.

"Good," Voight said before falling quiet again.

There was nothing else said by any of them until they were on Jay's street. Hailey had noticed the direction they were taking a few minutes ago so she wasn't surprised about where they were. She doubted she would be getting out with Jay though. Their boss hadn't shown up just to give them a lift; there was more to come, for her at least.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Voight said once the car came to a halt outside Jay's building.

"Yeah, thanks for the ride," Jay said before climbing out of the car.

It took all her strength not to look behind her or say anything, but Hailey didn't want to give Voight any more ammunition to use against Jay. So she kept her eyes set straight ahead while she heard Jay open the back and take out his bag. She was sure Voight glanced over at her a few times throughout, but she held her nerve, though when he put the car back into drive and pulled away, she allowed herself a quick look in the mirror. Jay was too far away for her to make out his expression, but she could tell from the slump of his shoulders that he was finding this as hard as she was.

Hailey considered saying something at that point, to ask where they were going since they had missed the turning that would take them to her place, and they were heading in the wrong direction for the district, but she decided to hold her tongue. She was going to let Voight show his hand first before she gave him anything. It was safer that way.

After five more minutes of silent driving, Voight parked the car outside of a bar. She followed his lead as he got out and started walking over to it. The place was fairly empty, so they grabbed a table away from the other patrons easily.

"Drink?" Voight asked as Hailey felt her stomach turn. She had no interest in drinking after last night. For all she knew she still had some alcohol in her system.

"Just water."

Voight didn't say a word but moved over to the bar. He came back a few minutes later and set a glass of water down for both of them. Hailey thanked him but she still wasn't sure what to make of the situation. She had been going over possible scenarios ever since they left the airport, and she still wasn't sure what to expect.

"How's the face?"

She hadn't seen that question coming. She knew the mark on her cheek from Fuller's gun stood out against her pale skin, but she'd barely even felt it today, though that was likely due to the painkillers she'd been taking for the hangover.

"It's fine."

Voight nodded slowly as if weighing up her answer. "And how was the case?"

"Fine. The guy was trafficking people, running drugs, torture, murder, pretty much everything under the sun, but we got him. It was a good result."

"Yeah, I watch the news. They were really singing the FBI's praises on this one," Voight said, a slight smile on his face as he held her gaze. For a moment Hailey let herself believe that this was some sort of talk about how well she had done, but then she noticed the smile drop from Voight's face. "Now how was it really? And don't say fine."

Hailey took a moment, deciding to drink some of the water in front of her. She knew what he was after now and why he had picked her up. He was assessing her, seeing if her stint away had fixed the problem or if she was still headed down the wrong path.

"Hailey, I'm here because you're a good cop, one of the best I've worked with, but what happened before cannot continue. So I need to know what happened in New York. And I don't mean the glowing report from the FBI or the news stations, I need to know what really happened. And don't lie to me, Jay didn't drop everything and fly out there to have a vacation."

She bobbed her head. He had a point with that. "If I tell you, you promise to leave Jay out of it? He only came to help. Any consequences should be directed at me, not him."

"Halstead's a big boy, he'll be fine. And I'm not interested in talking about him right now. This is about you, Hailey, no one else," Voight told her as she considered her options. "So?"

She didn't want to. She wanted to put all of it behind her, but Voight wasn't going to accept that. Her options were clear; tell him the truth or leave the unit.

"The first case was okay; I was warned about a certain tactic that didn't play well with the FBI rules." She felt the twitch of her lips at the memory. "But it really was fine, like a normal case. The second case was tough."

"Looked it," Voight said.

As much as she didn't want to admit what she had almost done, she knew he was already thinking she might have done worse.

"I came close okay, but I didn't do anything," she said as she held his gaze so he could see she was telling the truth. "The case wasn't going anywhere and he was getting away with too much, too many people had died and I saw an opportunity to make sure he would go down. I was prepared, but when it came down to it, I didn't go through with it. Instead I called Jay."

Hailey let the statement hang in the air as she bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself in check given the images this chat was resurfacing. Voight might not have been happy about Jay disappearing but at least now he might understand why.

"I take it this was about a week ago?" She nodded, still trying to get a read on what Voight was thinking. He was calm, too calm. "Explains why he was so distracted for a few days. So what happened to make him drop everything and fly out?"

Part of her had hoped he wouldn't realise the timeline and leave it at her admission of calling Jay, but of course he had been paying more attention.

"I stopped returning his calls," she said, but she had no intention of admitting the reason she had failed to frame Fuller a second time. No one else needed to know the truth about that incident because nothing good would come from it. And while she was willing to be honest about a lot of this with Voight, she was drawing the line there. "I came close a second time, but I didn't go through with it and when I got back to the hotel Jay was there. We talked, yelled a bit too, but we worked through it. He made me see the other ways. Look, Sarge, the truth is I wouldn't be where I am right now if he hadn't shown up so-"

"I get it," he said, cutting her off. "Jay acts on instinct, on what he thinks is right. It can be reckless sometimes, but he has a better moral compass than most of us so I wouldn't change it."

"Yeah." He had that right, it was one of the things she loved most about him.

"You on the other hand," Voight started as she held her breath, unsure of how he would evaluate her. "You're more calculated, you hide things better, make the more logical decisions, mostly. But you balance each other out. It's one of the reasons I've kept you partnered for so long even though you're the only detectives I have in the unit."

The admission was a bit of a surprise to her, but it made sense. Normally you'd want to spread out the experience, have your detectives partner up with newer officers, like she had done when Rojas first joined, but now she realised that Voight had purposely gone against that. A sense of gratitude washed over her as it dawned on her how much Voight did that she had taken for granted or overlooked in the past. She wasn't sure what to say about it though, and there was still a pressing question on her mind that she found herself vocalising.

"So what happens next? Am I coming back?"

The nauseous sensation suddenly returned but she was fairly sure it wasn't related to her hangover and rather the fact that Voight might decide to get rid of her.

"If I said no, I think the FBI would steal you pretty quickly based on what they were telling me," Voight said as Hailey felt a small smile grace her face. He wasn't far off the mark. She wondered if he knew about the job offer. "You know I want you back, Hailey, but I need you to understand why I couldn't let it continue and why I sent you to New York."

"I do." And that was the truth. She couldn't promise she wouldn't slip up or have the thoughts again in the future, but she had different ways to deal with it now.

"Okay, here's the deal then. You take a week off starting tomorrow. I got the run down from the FBI about what happened and what you did, and with the extra parts they weren't aware of, I've got a pretty good idea of where you're at right now. So you're taking the week to rest before you come back because I need you at your best." It clearly wasn't up for debate, and she could certainly do with catching up on all the missed sleep, so she gave a nod. "Good. Now the second. I know you and Jay have your way of dealing with things, and as long as that doesn't interfere with work and it's helping, that's fine. However, if at any point you find yourself in a similar situation and it's not working with him for any reason, you have to come to me. You tell me these things and I can help, I can protect you, but I don't ever want to be put in the same position as I was before you left."

"I know."

"I mean it. You do anything like that again, it will be the last time you do it in my unit."

Hailey knew he was serious, and she couldn't fault his logic or say his requests were unreasonable. "I promise."

Voight held her gaze for a few moments before finally giving a nod. "Okay then."

A silence fell between them after that. Hailey drank some more of her water whilst trying not to yawn or show any signs of discomfort as she felt Voight's eyes on her. It seemed like he was still assessing her, which she hated, but then he stood up.

"Come on," he said, motioning for her to follow. "I'll give you a ride home."

* * *

The drive back to her place was quiet. Hailey spent the time looking out of the window, taking in the city she had been away from. It looked like it was about to rain, which for once she wasn't dreading. Probably because she wouldn't be on the street but instead wrapped up inside unless she did go to meet Jay. She wanted to talk to him, to tell him what had happened with Voight, but she had to wait until she was home for that.

A few minutes later they pulled up outside her house and Hailey turned to Voight. "Thanks for the ride."

He just nodded before opening his mouth. "We'll talk later in the week. But for now I think there's someone waiting to see you."

Hailey furrowed her brow before looking towards the house and noticing the twitch of the curtains. A small smile came to her face as she realised how much she had missed her roommate too.

"See you soon, Sarge," she said as she hopped out of the car.

She made her way around to the back and grabbed her suitcase before setting off towards her house. Though she didn't get far before she heard Voight calling her name again, causing her to spin back to face him.

"It's good to have you back," he said, holding her gaze for a moment before looking back to the road and driving off.

There was a smile on her face as she made her way to the front door and stuck her key in the lock. It was good to be back.

"H-woah, what the hell happened?" Vanessa said as soon as Hailey opened the door and dragged her suitcase inside.

"Hi to you too," Hailey said as she kicked the door shut and moved over to her roommate.

"Hi," Vanessa said as she gave her a careful hug, clearly worried about the extent of her injuries. "So what happened here?"

Hailey let out a short laugh as Vanessa gestured to her face. It wasn't as bad as she was making out. "The guy we arrested tried to get away and he managed to land one decent blow, but I'm fine."

Vanessa studied her face a little longer before accepting it. "You hungry? I was just about to eat and I made way too much."

She hadn't eaten much today so she knew she needed to, though Jay had been planning to get food with her before Voight had shown up. While she hadn't been thrilled at the time, it had been useful, and it seemed as though things with her and Voight were going to be okay.

"Come on," Vanessa said, grabbing her arm and pulling her into the kitchen. "When was the last time you had some decent home cooking?"

"No comment," she said as Vanessa pulled out a stool and indicated for her to take a seat.

There didn't seem to be any point in fighting her roommate on this one. Besides it did smell good and she was no longer getting the nausea, so it was probably a good idea to eat something. As Vanessa dished up their food, Hailey shot off a quick text to Jay to let him know that everything was okay and she would talk to him soon, but that Rojas had cornered her for now.

"So," Vanessa started once she'd set a plate of food down in front of Hailey, "was that Voight I saw?"

The question wasn't a surprise given that Voight didn't normally show up without a reason, but she couldn't tell her the full truth.

"Yeah, he picked me up at the airport, wanted to discuss some things." She took a bite of her food, feeling Vanessa's eyes on her for the unfulfilling answer. "He just wanted to see how I was after the case, told me to take the week off to rest up. The case was pretty intense."

That was the most she was willing to share on it for now; she had no intention of providing any details about what had happened to her over there or the fact that Jay had been with her. Voight wouldn't mention it to anyone else, so there was no need for it to go any further than her, Voight, and Jay.

"Yeah, we all saw the news. Seemed pretty crazy," Vanessa said, sounding a little less enthusiastic than before. Hailey had a feeling she might have just realised the sort of things she would have dealt with over there, not that the news reported it fully, but it was likely enough when you were in their line of work. "You okay? Sounds like it was a hard case."

It had been, more than Vanessa would ever know, but she couldn't open up and tell her the truth. It had been hard enough being that vulnerable around Jay and she wasn't ready to let anyone else see that side of her, no matter how close she and Vanessa had become.

"Yeah, we got him in the end. Might not have slept too much but it's over now," she said before forcing a smile onto her face and ignoring a few images that had sprung to mind. "And I'm certainly looking forward to getting back into the Chicago cases and working with you lot again."

Vanessa nodded, clearly reconsidering asking all the questions she originally wanted to. Hailey guessed Vanessa had managed to take the hints from what had been said or had noticed how awful she currently looked. Whatever it was, it meant that Hailey had time to take a couple of bites of food before deciding to break the silence between them. She had no interest in talking about what had happened to her, but originally she had told Jay that she wanted to come home so she could see how Vanessa was doing.

"So enough about me, how are things with you? What's been going on while I was away?"

Vanessa suddenly seemed more interested in her food as she bobbed her head. "They're good. Couple of stakeouts, took down a drug ring, got drunk with Kim and Sargent Platt, arrested Superman because he was fighting Batman-"

"Wait, what?"

"Stag do, turns out Batman was sleeping with Superman's bride to be. We were just passing through at the time but when they started throwing bottles at each other we had to step in."

Hailey felt the twitch of her lips; she could only imagine the scene, but it sounded far better than anything she had seen recently at work. "And you got drunk with Kim and Platt?"

"Yeah, Kim wanted a girls night and forced us to come along, but it was good in the end."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, Sargent Platt is way more fun when she's drinking. Plus, she knows pretty much everything going on, and she doesn't hold back once she's had a few drinks." Hailey would have said Trudy didn't hold back normally, but then she had met drunk Platt a couple of times too and knew exactly what Vanessa meant. "She asked me about Luis."

Hailey had wanted to bring it up at some point but Vanessa had beat her to it.

"How did that go?" she asked as she set her fork down and focused on her roommate.

"Awkward at first, but it did help. You know she told me the same thing as you, about the unit being a family?"

"Because it's true," Hailey said, gaining a nod from Vanessa. She was a little less concerned about how Vanessa was doing after that, and happy that Vanessa was getting on better with the others, though she decided she should still check. "You want to talk about it?"

Vanessa shook her head. "I'm good, really. It sucked at first but after spending a couple of nights drinking and talking with them, and hearing about everything they were going through, it helped put things in perspective. I'm not that person anymore and I did all I could for him. I can live with that."

Hailey watched her for a few moments before offering her a smile. She could read Vanessa and she knew she was telling the truth. "Okay, well the offer stands any time."

"Thanks. Oh, you should come next time."

She wasn't the sharing type, not in the way it seemed the rest of them had done, but she wanted to encourage Vanessa to continue. "Why not."

That got a smile on Vanessa's face before the sound of her phone distracted her. "Huh."

"What's up?" Hailey asked as she picked up her fork and dug back into the remaining food.

"Jay's back," Vanessa said after typing a reply and setting her phone down on the counter. "I can't believe I didn't mention that earlier. Did you know he went AWOL? Like he just disappeared one day, and Voight was pissed. Have you spoken to him? Do you know what's going on?"

"Yeah, we spoke."

"Is he okay? What happened?"

She did. But as much as she trusted Vanessa, Hailey couldn't share the fact that she was the reason why Jay had disappeared. All she could do was to continue with the story he had told everyone. "He's okay, he just had to take care of something personal."

"That's what Voight said the second day after he disappeared," Vanessa said, clearly realising that while Hailey and Voight knew what had happened to Jay, they wouldn't be sharing the information. "Well, I'm glad he's okay, he seemed pretty worried about something the day before. Guessing it's sorted now."

Hailey nodded as Vanessa's phone dinged, letting her know there was another message.

"Kim said they're all at Molly's with Jay. We should go, everyone will be excited you're back too."

"Yeah," she dragged out the word. The idea of alcohol was not making her feel great, but then Jay was there and she hadn't had a chance to talk to him yet. Not that she could really talk freely if their colleagues were there, but it would be nice to see everyone and Jay, even if it had only been a few hours since she'd last been with him.

"We could just go for one, say hi," Vanessa suggested before looking back up to her. "But also if you're too tired from everything, don't worry about it. I mean we could stay in and watch a movie if you wanted or I could get out of the way and let you have some space."

Hailey wondered if she looked as bad as she felt given how quickly Vanessa backtracked on the suggestion of going out. It was probably a terrible idea after all; she was tired, potentially still a little hungover, and she really had no interest in answering the questions that would certainly come her way, but then maybe this was the start of things returning to normal, or as normal as they had ever been. They had all been out in this state before and it wasn't like she was working tomorrow; she could spend the whole day catching up on sleep and dealing with everything else.

"Let's go."


	11. Chapter 11

As Hailey walked towards the entrance to Molly's with Vanessa, she found herself questioning her earlier decision. She had thought getting out and seeing everyone would be nice after her time away, but she could already hear the jovial sounds of everyone inside and she wasn't sure she was in the right frame of mind for it. There was no way they wouldn't ask questions or expect details, so she would have to go to plan B. She would fake her way through it, just like she had done a hundred times before.

When they reached the door, Hailey noticed the slight concern on Vanessa's face, which she was clearly trying to conceal. She offered her roommate a reassuring smile in response as she pushed open the door. If it got too bad, she would just leave. Besides, it might end up being better than she was currently predicting.

With the thought in mind, Hailey stepped inside and did a quick scan of the room. There was a slightly larger crowd than normal for a weekday, but it wasn't too busy. She recognised most of the people who moved past her, though there were a few new faces. However, she lost interest in them as soon as her eyes landed on the familiar group at the end of the bar.

"Look who it is," Kev called out as Hailey felt a genuine smile coming to her face.

He had been the first to spot her and was already on his way over to her as the others turned around. She caught each of their eyes briefly before locking onto Jay. It was only for a second though because she was soon enveloped in a hug by Kev.

She hugged him back for a few moments before he let go and gestured to her face. "So what happened here?"

"Think you're better off asking what happened to the other guy," Adam said as he leaned in to give her a hug. "Good to have you back."

"Thanks," she said as she pulled back to see the concern on Kim's face. A brief summary would likely suffice. "We arrested someone yesterday and he got one good shot in after I tackled him. I'm fine. Really."

"Yeah, you look great," Kim told her with a grin as they exchanged a quick hug.

Everyone shared a laugh but then they all seemed to realise the exact same thing. In unison, the four of them turned towards Jay, who was stood behind Adam and Kevin, before looking back at her.

"You look like you need a beer," Kev said, gesturing to the bar.

"Yeah, we'll get a round in," Vanessa said, walking after Kev.

"You and Jay should grab us a table," Kim said as she nudged Adam towards the bar.

Hailey was sure she heard him mutter 'subtle' under his breath as he allowed Kim to direct him over to the bar, but Hailey lost interest in the matter as she watched the man in front of her. He had his hands in his pockets and he was keeping a decent sized gap between them, but she could see the smile playing on his lips.

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," he said quietly. "Thought you were staying in tonight."

She nodded, contemplating her options. "Vanessa got a message from Kim saying you were down here with everyone, so she suggested we join in the celebration of us both being back."

"I see," Jay said as Hailey suddenly noticed the glances from their friends at the bar.

"I think we have an audience."

Jay nodded before closing the gap between them and wrapping his arms around her.

"Assuming we're playing this as friends who haven't seen each other since you left," he whispered in her ear as she returned the hug.

"Yeah." She held onto him a little longer than she probably should have as his friend before pulling back. It was safer this way. "We should get that table."

Hailey didn't miss the smug grin on Vanessa's face as she walked past her and over to the only empty table at the back. Clearly her roommate thought she was some sort of matchmaker, but it wasn't the worst thing in the world. Given how they were behaving it was likely everyone else believed they had only just seen each other for the first time in two and a half weeks rather than the first time in only a few hours.

"So what happened with Voight? Everything okay?" Jay asked, keeping his voice low as they took a seat opposite each other at the table.

"Yeah. He wanted to know what happened," she said, doing a quick check to make sure no one else would be able to hear her. "What really happened rather than what he was told by the FBI and what was reported in the news."

"You tell him?"

"Yeah, it was either that or lose my job, but he gets it." Voight had told her a while ago that he didn't want her turning into him, so as weird as it was, out of everyone in her life he probably understood what she was going through the most. "Told me to take the week off before coming back in."

"That's good," Jay said as he started to reach his hand out before placing it flat on the table.

As much as she wanted to say to hell with it and take his hand, she couldn't. Relationships in their line of work were hard so they needed some time to figure it out just the two of them before everyone else got involved. However, she did have a workaround. Keeping her eyes on his, she gently nudged his foot with her own.

"Why don't I bring breakfast over before you go to work tomorrow?" Jay's grin doubled in size at her words, though he seemed amused more than anything else. "What?"

"Or," he started, keeping his voice low so she could only just hear him, "we could do breakfast in bed and then just stay in bed."

She shook her head, matching his expression. "I think Voight was pretty clear."

"He was, but then he messaged me," he said as she indicated for him to continue. "Told me to take the next two days off as long as I fill in some HR paperwork when I get back."

"What kind of HR paperwork?" she asked, but she had a feeling she already knew the answer.

Of course Voight had worked it out even though it had been less than twenty four hours since they had worked it out. She guessed it was a good sign that he had given Jay time off and was only asking for the paperwork to be signed though. It could have easily gone in a different direction given his general thoughts about office relationships.

"Oh you know, the kind where you declare uh-" But Jay cut himself off.

Hailey was confused for a moment, but she understood when three beers were set down on the table.

"Nice to have you back, Jay," Vanessa said as she slid one bottle over to him and one over to Hailey.

Jay took hold of his with a thanks while Hailey watched on. Vanessa glanced between the two of them before seeming to decide against saying anything else and taking a seat next to Jay. Hailey thought she might have to break the silence but a few seconds later, the rest of the team were taking a seat at the table.

"So, how was working with the feds?" Adam asked. "You-"

"Uh uh, no," Vanessa cut him off. "No work talk tonight."

"Why? You get all the good stories before you came out?" Kev asked. "That ain't fair, you gotta share with the group."

"No. I'm just saying all we do is talk about work," Vanessa explained.

"Because all we do is work," Kim said, gaining agreement from most of the others.

"Well speak for yourself, some of us have an outside life," Adam chipped in before launching into a story about his and Kev's night out.

Everyone seemed keen to find out what had gone on during the spontaneous guys night, the one they'd only decided to have after finding out about the girls night which they weren't invited to. There was teasing and jokes being made, mostly by Adam, but everyone was smiling and laughing. When Hailey spotted her chance, she shot Vanessa a thankful look for the deflection. She knew the questions would come at some point, but the longer she had to put some distance between New York and when they came, the easier it would be.

Vanessa just raised her bottle in acknowledgement before focusing her attention on Adam. Hailey realised she should do the same but after grabbing hold of the bottle, she decided against drinking any. She still wasn't feeling it, and after a check on Jay, it seemed he wasn't feeling it much either. He took one sip before setting the bottle down and sharing a knowing look with her; maybe the hair of the dog wasn't going to help them this time.

* * *

For everyone's initial resistance, Vanessa's policy of no work talk actually paid off. It turned out they all had enough stories to share, or mostly Adam and Kim had stories to share that kept everyone laughing for an hour. Hailey was thankful that no one pushed her or Jay to contribute, and instead tried to keep them distracted with random tales from their lives. It seemed they had all realised shortly after taking a seat at the table that neither her nor Jay were in the sharing mood tonight.

"Okay, my round," Kim said as she got off her seat. "Oh, how about shots?"

"No."

There was a laugh from the group at Hailey's reaction as she looked down to the table. She knew she was going to have to provide an explanation for the outburst now. So after running a hand through her hair, she looked up to find all eyes on her.

"There was a celebration last night after we caught the guy," she explained. "And there were shots, amongst other things."

"Well that explains this," Kev said as he reached out and took hold of the full beer still sat in front of her. "Was worried you were giving up drinking. But now I know you're just hungover, I'm here for you."

"Thanks, Kev," she said as he started on her beer.

"Okay, so a round for us lot, and a glass of water for Upton," Kim said as Hailey gave her an appreciative nod.

"You know I might call it a night there, it's been a long day," Jay said, catching her eye for a moment before looking back to the group. "Won't be able to drive if I have another, but thanks for this."

Hailey noticed that he hadn't actually finished the current bottle in front of him, but no one mentioned it. She had a feeling they all thought Jay was still dealing with whatever had caused his disappearance rather than the fact that he was also hungover. It was probably for the best, but it meant that both Adam and Kev protested a little at him trying to bail. Not that it swayed Jay who declined to stay out any longer.

"Hey, Jay," Vanessa said before he had managed to get his coat on, causing him to turn and face her.

"Yeah?"

"Maybe you could give Hailey a ride back," she said before facing Hailey. "What? You look like you're gonna pass out soon, and I'm not carrying you upstairs later."

"Uh huh." She was fully aware of what her roommate was up to, everyone probably was.

"I can give you a ride if you want," Jay offered.

Hailey took a moment to think it over before nodding and hopping off her seat. Vanessa was clearly trying to get them some time alone, and no one was trying to convince her to stay, so what did she have to lose?

After a quick round of goodbyes, Hailey pulled on her coat and headed to the exit with Jay. Neither of them spoke as they crossed the road and got into Jay's truck. But as soon as Jay started the engine, he broke the silence.

"So am I taking you home?"

"Yeah. I think Vanessa might notice if I'm not there when she gets back."

The fact that Vanessa had to walk past Hailey's room, to which the door was currently wide open, to get to her own bedroom would be a dead giveaway.

Jay nodded as he pulled out onto the road. "How was your talk with her? She okay?"

"Wasn't much to it. Turns out she's been having drunken discussions with Kim and Platt at these girls nights."

"Yeah, that uh…that sounds dangerous."

Hailey chuckled, it really did. "Yeah, you know I've been invited to the next one?"

"You'll hate that," Jay said as she gave a nod. "But let me guess, you're gonna go anyway."

"Once. For Vanessa."

Jay laughed. "I can't wait to hear those stories."

"What makes you think I'll be sharing them?"

"Well, I mean since we're together, we're supposed to tell each other things." She hummed her agreement, catching Jay's eye for a second before he focused on the road. "Maybe not everything though. I don't need to hear about Platt and Mouch. Ever."

"You think I do? Besides, I have a feeling if I go you may become the talking point."

"Yeah, Rojas is not subtle. But I like her ideas, at least this one."

Hailey couldn't disagree with that. When she had woken up this morning, she hadn't thought too much about what would occur, and there had been a few unexpected turns along the way, but after everything that had happened today, this was exactly how she wanted to spend her evening.

"So what else did Voight say to you?" Jay asked.

They hadn't managed to have a proper conversation at Molly's, and given Voight's change of heart to Jay working tomorrow, she could understand his curiosity. So she gave him the highlighted version of the whole conversation as they drove to hers. The story seemed to fit perfectly time wise as she had just finished explaining the ultimatum Voight gave her when they turned onto her street.

After spotting a gap a few cars down, Hailey called out for Jay to stop the truck. He did as she asked but looked confused since they were still halfway down the street.

"Park here." She pointed to a space on the left.

"But your house is up there," he said, gesturing up the street. "And-"

"And I'm pretty sure Vanessa would notice your truck parked outside tomorrow morning and tell the whole unit. Or at least Kim and Platt given their new buddy system."

It seemed to take Jay a moment to put it together; maybe he was as tired as she was. "Tomorrow morning?"

"Yeah, unless you don't want to sta-"

Yet she didn't get a chance to finish as Jay leant over and kissed her. It was short lived though as a car honked behind them. They broke apart quickly and Jay set about parking in the space she had found before raising an apologetic hand to the driver who went past them.

The guy didn't seem amused, but he couldn't dampen their spirits. They were both still wearing stupid smiles as they got out and started walking towards her house.

"So," Jay dragged out the word as he took hold of her hand. "We actually have two days off together."

"We do," she said as she interlinked her fingers with his. Normally she wouldn't be so open on her own street, but anyone who would have seen them was at Molly's right now. "You sound like you have an idea."

"I was thinking one day in your bed, one day in mine. You know, equal." Hailey let out a short laugh before he continued. "What?"

"And they say romance is dead."

"You don't want romance," he said confidently before looking over to her. "I know you remember."

"Oh yeah? So what is it that I want then?" she asked as she let go of his hand and pulled out her keys.

"Two days in bed with me," he said as she opened the door with a laugh.

"You really are sure of yourself," she said as they stepped inside.

Jay didn't say anything, but after she had shut the door Hailey found him stood right next to her, a cocky grin on his face. Acting on instinct, and before she could think it through properly, she grabbed hold of him, spun him around, and shoved him back against the wall. He seemed a little shocked but before he had a chance to say a word, she leaned in and pushed her lips to his.

He kissed her back immediately as his hands found her body and pulled her closer. Hailey wasn't sure how long they stayed in the hall but when she felt Jay's hands at the bottom of her shirt, attempting to remove it, she took a step back and managed to get one word out.

"Upstairs."

It was unlikely Vanessa would be back any time soon, but they couldn't risk staying down here, and Hailey knew that the rational part of her brain was not likely to function for much longer.

"Yeah," Jay breathed before following her up the stairs and into her room.

As soon as Hailey closed the door behind her, Jay pinned her up against it, just like she had done to him downstairs. And this time when his hands went to the bottom of her top, she let him take it off before following suit and removing his. Once it was gone, Jay lifted her up and carried her over to the bed.

"So much for…wanting an early night," Jay said between breaths as he set her down on the bed.

"Shut up," she said as she pulled him down to her. As far as Hailey was concerned, they didn't need to talk anymore.

* * *

The next morning Hailey was awoken by the sound of the shower. It took her a few seconds to realise that she was at home, in her own bed, and the current sounds she could hear were those of Vanessa's normal, getting ready for work, routine. It was weird, but she had actually missed the sounds of living with someone else. Sure Jay had stayed with her at the hotel for a while but hotels were different. She was home now.

The thought brought a smile to her face as she opened her eyes to check the time. It was still early, but then she hadn't stayed out too late. However, she had no intentions of moving from her bed right now because having a lie in was something she had not done enough recently. Not that she was much of a lie in person, she preferred to be up and doing things when she could, but the occasional one really was the best thing, especially when there was someone else to share it with.

With that in mind, Hailey rolled over to find Jay lying on his back still fast asleep. She was surprised given how light of a sleeper he normally was, but maybe the other night was catching up with him. Either that or he was awake and keeping his eyes closed while he waited for her.

Deciding to err on the side of caution, Hailey carefully moved over to him until she could rest her head on his shoulder and drape her arm around him. He didn't move straight away so Hailey thought she had gotten away with it, but a few seconds later she felt his arms wrap around her, holding her close.

"So you are awake," she said as she looked up to find Jay staring straight back at her, a sleepy grin on his face.

"Yeah, Rojas is not quiet in the mornings."

Hailey let out a short laugh, either she was normally up before her roommate or she had learnt to sleep through the noise.

"Well she'll be gone in about twenty minutes," she explained since she knew Vanessa's routine to a T. "And we-"

"Don't have anywhere to be," Jay finished for her as he rolled onto his side, facing her fully.

He kept his arms securely around her as he leaned in and kissed her softly. It was just like yesterday morning, at the beginning at least, and Hailey realised she could certainly get used to waking up like this.

"So what's the plan, still gonna stay in bed all day?" she asked before leaning back in to kiss him.

"Mmm," he muttered against her before pulling back slightly. "But with breaks for food. You still owe me breakfast remember?"

"Uh, only because I was going to spend the night at home."

"Which you did," he said as one of his hands started wandering down her back.

"Yeah but you stayed too," she told him.

"You trying to back out?" he asked as his hand made it to her side.

She shook her head lightly, warning him not to, but then he started tickling her. Instinctively she tried to fend him off, her hands pushing him away as she tried to back up, all the while doing her best not to make too much noise. "Jay."

Yet he didn't let up so she shuffled back a little further before realising her mistake. She had been closer to the edge of the bed than she had expected and suddenly she found herself falling. Jay managed to grab her, but her legs hit the floor with a thud as she attempted to steady herself.

"Shit, you okay?" Jay asked. He had one arm wrapped around her waist and was trying to help her back up, but she didn't get a chance to answer due to the call of her roommate.

"Hailey." Her and Jay froze as the sound of footsteps got closer before stopping outside her door. "You okay?"

"Yeah," she called back before glancing at Jay to let him know she really was fine. "Yeah, I'm good. Just uh, just dropped my suitcase on the floor."

There was silence for a few moments as Hailey focused on the door. Vanessa wouldn't come in without asking but she was ready to make a move, just in case.

"Okay. I should carry on getting ready."

Hailey waited until she heard Vanessa's door close before standing up from her current position. That was closer than she would have liked and there was now a pressing issue she had to deal with.

"You good?" Jay whispered as he sat up.

"Yeah," she said as she moved around the room and threw on some clothes before feeling Jay behind her.

"Why are you getting dressed?"

"My suitcase is downstairs and I have about five minutes until she sees it."

"I'll wait here," he said, moving out of the way and back over to the bed.

There was no need to say anything more on the matter, so Hailey carefully opened the door to her room, doing her best to be as stealthy as possible. The last thing she wanted was Vanessa catching her as she brought the suitcase into her room, but she knew her roommate, so she was sure she had time. She could hear the sound of the hairdryer as she moved along the corridor swiftly before taking the steps two at a time and grabbing hold of her suitcase.

Getting it back up the stairs was a little harder but the slight fear of being discovered gave her a boost. Within three minutes of leaving her room she was walking back inside, suitcase in hand, and her roommate was none the wiser.

"Nicely done," Jay said as she shut the door behind her.

It clicked into place just as the sounds of the hairdryer died. Once she turned back around, Hailey raised a finger to her lips, she knew what was next. Jay seemed confused as he remained lying in bed until a few seconds later when they both heard Vanessa's door again.

"See you later," Vanessa called out as she walked past the room.

"Yeah, have a good one," Hailey called back before moving over to the bed.

She was about to climb back in but she paused when she saw the hand Jay held up. She furrowed her brow at him, deciding they were better off not speaking until they heard Vanessa leave the house, just to be safe. Jay clearly got the message as he didn't say a word, instead he pointed at her top and gestured for it to go. Hailey shook her head, a smile coming to her face as she crawled on top of the bed and over to him.

He sat up properly and took hold of her, pulling her in for a kiss as soon as she was close enough. Hailey wasn't surprised when his hands moved to the bottom of her top shortly after. And she was even less surprised when he dragged it up her body, breaking away from their kiss just long enough to pull it over her head.

"Your rule," he whispered as his lips brushed against hers. "No clothes zone."

"That was the hotel," she said, keeping her voice low, though not making any effort to stop his wandering hands as they tugged at the shorts she had thrown on.

"Think it applies to all beds when we're in them."

"We'll see," she said as she heard a door opening.

Instinctively she turned back to look at the door to her room. It sounded like it came from downstairs, but she wanted to be sure because she wasn't ready to explain this situation to anyone else. Not that she was ashamed but given how new it was, and everything else going on in their lives, she just wanted to keep it between them for now.

As her eyes were greeted by the closed door, she realised there was nothing to worry about. They were still alone in their private bubble and her roommate was none the wiser. Hailey started to turn back after hearing the front door shut, but she only got halfway before she felt herself being rolled over, and the next thing she knew Jay was hovering above her.

"Hi," she said, the normal tone of her voice back now that they no longer had to be careful.

"Hey," Jay said before leaning down and kissing her. "So we're all alone now."

"We are." Her hands started moving over his body on instinct, yet he broke their lips apart a moment later and let out a yawn.

"Oh wow, see now that's attractive," she teased him, seeing a hint of red on his cheeks.

"Shut up," he said once he'd finished.

He flopped down next to her as she also let out a yawn. When she looked over to him, he raised an eyebrow, as if to say look who's talking. She ignored him as she shuffled closer and placed her arm around him before cuddling up to him. Maybe getting some more sleep was a better idea for now. They still had a lot to catch up on and Vanessa had probably woken him up a while ago.

Jay seemed to be on the same page as he pulled her closer and buried his head against her neck while she closed her eyes. She could definitely get used to this.

"To be continued," he muttered.

"Oh definitely," she said, hearing a slight chuckle from Jay.

He placed a gentle kiss to her neck before speaking again, his voice not much more than a whisper. "I love you."

Hailey couldn't hold back the growing smile on her face as she ran a hand through his hair. "Love you too."

"You still owe me breakfast though."

"Jay." He hummed against her skin in response. "Go to sleep."

He didn't say another word but soon after Hailey felt his breathing even out, letting her know he had drifted off. It felt slightly odd since she was normally the one to fall asleep first, but Jay hadn't exactly had a vacation recently with everything that had happened. She knew he needed time to recuperate too, and after everything he had done for her recently, she was going to make sure he got it.

As she ran her hand through his hair again, Hailey found her thoughts drifting back to the day Jay had dropped her off at the airport. She wondered if that had been the start of all of this, the hug they had shared when they had never really hugged before. Everything seemed to have moved so quickly after that, and so much had happened between them and for her personally. Jay had come barrelling in during one of the darkest times and been the light she needed, and that was something she would never forget.

While part of her wanted to analyse what it all meant and what she could have done differently, she stopped herself as she cuddled a little closer to him. They had proved they were a great team time and time again, and she had proved, as hard as it was, that she could change. There would be time to discuss and reflect on it later, so she didn't need to get ahead of herself.

It had only been a few weeks after all; there was plenty of time to work out what happened next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. Hope you all enjoyed it :)


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